Kimozart

My Poetry Has Been Published!

2011-11-27T21:59:00.003-05:00

Attention all lovers of music, opera, literature, and poetry!

I’m very excited to announce that my book of poetry, The Songs of Orpheus, has been published by Amazon as an Ebook. That means you can read it on your Kindle or on your computer (you just have to download the Kindle application here). I would love for you all to check it out and maybe purchase it - it’s only $2.99 (you can spend that much on one latte at Starbucks). Not only is it about 50 pages of my poetry, but there are photographs dispersed throughout to add to the mood of the book.

The Songs of Orpheus is a chapbook in two parts: the first is a collection of 23 poems based on the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice. Narrated by Orpheus, it isn’t simply a retelling of the story. Instead, it’s an artistic view on the major themes of the myth, adding decoration to the basic scaffolding of the original plot. The second part is composed of stand-alone poems which all explore the artist’s view of the world, with a strong emphasis on music and culture. The first half is heavily influenced by Gluck’s opera Orfeo ed Euridice and the second half has many musical allusions, including Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, Rossini’s The Barber of Seville, and Massenet’s (Goethe’s) Werther so you will really appreciate it if you’re a music lover.

I’ve worked hard on this little book and I’m very happy to see it finally published. I’d love to share my work and passion with you, so if you’d like to check it out, please do. Also, if you read it and have opinions about it, please leave a review. I’m trying to make my place in the literary world and every little bit helps!

You can buy it by clicking the title above or by clicking here. Even if you can’t buy it, I’d love for you to promote it to your friends. Also, here is my official Author Page.

You guys rock and I really hope you enjoy it!!

The Artist's Body

2011-11-15T01:03:00.007-05:00

While I was rehearsing for L'elisir, the company brought in their choreographer from time to time to sit in on rehearsal. For the first time in my experience, the choreographer was watching every scene that we rehearsed, making comments on our body language and on how we moved onstage. I found this both extremely helpful and a bit intimidating.

Granted, I'm always aware of my body when I'm onstage. It's crucial not only for good stage presence, but also for creating character and bringing across emotion and mood to the audience. But when the choreographer was sitting in on rehearsal, I became hyper-aware of how I was using every single part of my body at every moment. I learned a lot from her comments and probably avoided even more comments simply because I was conscious of what I was doing all the time.

The best lesson I took away from this was to keep this hyper-awareness all the time. It taught me this new level of paying attention to my body, no matter how important I am to the scene at a given moment.

I just love how body movement can define a character. This concept has intrigued me from the very start of my love affair with opera. I love to see a singer play different roles and develop a completely different set of mannerisms for each one. It is this attention to detail that makes opera so rich and exciting.

Here is one of my favorite examples of the extremes that a singer can take to create a specific body language for a character. Here is a video of Joyce Didonato as Rosina from Rossini's Il Barbiere di Siviglia and here is another video of her playing Isolier in Rossini's Le Comte Ory. Each character's movement vocabulary is determined by their personality, gender, social station, etc and that is very clear in Ms. Didonato's portrayals.

Personally, I love playing with different types of movement every time I'm given a new character to learn. I find this particular part of the process to be simultaneously challenging and fun. It's been a huge change to go from my character in L'elisir to Hansel. Although, to be honest, Hansel is one of my favorite characters to play because of his physicality. He has so much energy and youth in him; you can always find something new to do with the role. Besides, I find the pants roles to be a special challenge since a male body language differs so much from a female one.

Speaking of pants roles, there is a new resource out there now for pants roles. This website goes through all the basics and answers the questions that most mezzos encounter when they're preparing pants roles. It covers everything from movement to binding and it presents good videos and DVDs to study. I would recommend it to anyone who is preparing a pants role or will most likely have to in the future.

Just as an announcement: all the information for my Hansel and Gretel is up on the Bethel Woods Center for the Arts website. I'll be performing Dec. 10 at 2pm in Bethel, NY. It's going to be so much fun! Not only are we doing the show, but we're having a Q&A in costume with the kids after the show. I am really pumped for this production. It's a great cast and the production is simply adorable. It's going to be fun to have so many kids in the audience! I fully support exposing children to opera as early as possible and I think this is a great way to do it.

The Art of Storytelling: Opera for the Masses

2011-11-09T01:08:00.004-05:00

Over the past weekend, I participated in a very interesting and different experience. I sang in Divaria Productions' L'elisir d'amore and we performed as part of a private party at the Tuxedo Club in Tuxedo Park. The people ate dinner and then watched as we put on an entire opera in the dining hall.

Not only did the venue interest me, but the response of the audience also intrigued me. There were no subtitles or English translations of any kind: there was only the music and the actors on stage, bridging the language gap and bringing the story to life with their actions and emotions. I could tell during the show that the audience was completely engaged. They laughed and gasped right along with the plot. We had the chance to mingle with the audience at a reception after the show and everyone mentioned that they'd completely understood the story. I know now, for a fact, that opera transcends language and time period and culture. It speaks to everyone. I guess the question is: are they willing to listen?

I'm always trying to get more people interested in opera. I think this is a great new way to reach yet another type of audience. It reminds me of the "olden days" when opera was a type of after-dinner entertainment. It felt like we were reliving some old pastime that has since been abandoned. It was simply exciting. I'd love to have the opportunity to do something like this again.

Super Update!

2011-10-20T17:07:00.005-04:00

There is so much going on right now! I could just drown in music, but instead, I'll write this blog to let you know what I'm up to!

First of all, Eugene Onegin with Delaware Valley Opera was an incredible experience. I had the opportunity to collaborate with so many talented and experienced artists! I learned some very important craft (and life!) skills from my cast- and crew-mates.

Here's a picture of me as Mama Larina with my "daughters." They had to make me look old with makeup because apparently I "look like I'm 2." LOL. Like I said, I really loved working with them.

That's why I'm very excited to work with DVO again soon in their production of Hansel and Gretel. I'll be singing Hansel in their abridged, children's version of Humperdinck's opera. I adore the role of Hansel and I'm so beyond excited to be singing it so soon! That production will run in December and will be on tour throughout the Delaware Valley area (NY and PA).

But right now, I'm focusing on L'elisir d'amore with Divaria Productions. They mounted this production last Spring and they've been asked to revive it for a private dinner party in Tuxedo Park. How cool is that? It's like Ariadne auf Naxos without the Composer. I've performed in some really interesting places, but I've never before performed in a ballroom! I'm looking forward to the experience: it should be unique!

Besides all this opera stuff, I've been applying to grad schools and summer programs. Some programs have really streamlined their application process this year and I appreciate it. I mean, I still spend hours filling these things out, but it seems like less to me.

Well, that's all for now, but I'll keep you updated as things progress. I have things lined up for the spring, too, so there's tons to talk about!

Also, I wanted to let you know that I have a very active blog over at Tumblr. It's Operarox! and not only do I post opera-related things every day, but I host opera liveshows where opera lovers come to chat about opera. I show clips on a given topic and then we discuss them. Past topics have been: Love Duets, Best Sidekicks, Unknown Singers, Old School Heroes, and Scary Moments in Opera. It's a lot of fun and I would suggest it to anyone who enjoys opera. I'm also currently running a contest to boost my following and I'll be giving away opera prizes. So far, I've announced two prizes: a Don Giovanni DVD and a Susan Graham CD. So if you're on Tumblr, stop by and check out my blog! If not, you might want to check it out because there's a fun and vivacious opera-loving community on there that would love to have you!

I hope you are all well and I'm looking forward to all the fun stuff that's happening!

30 Miles to Civilization

2011-07-14T15:55:00.003-04:00

Hello from sunny Nowhere!

I'm kidding. Kind of.

It's been fun creating Eugene Onegin out here in the middle of nowhere. Here we are, a band of singers, learning to live in a place where there isn't much to do. Most of us are from Manhattan or some other city, so it's been a bit of culture shock getting used to driving 30 miles to get anywhere.

And, yet, it's such great character research. The characters in Eugene Onegin have to stave off boredom and the mundane lifestyle of the country. In this way, every little social interaction becomes a really huge deal. Hence the tragedy of Eugene Onegin. Like I keep saying: this all could have been avoided if Eugene had just put a ring on it the first time around! (lol)

All kidding aside, I'm having a great time here at DVO learning and studying and just bonding with other singers. I'm basically the youngest in the cast, so there are so many people to learn from! I've definitely grown as a performer throughout this experience already, having been confronted with all new challenges. It's such a leap to go from school to this, but I couldn't love it more. I've been given the opportunity to be part of a professional production and it has taught me a lot about how to handle the ropes out here in "the real world," among other things.

One of the best parts of being out here in the country (besides being able to hear myself think!) is the absolutely gorgeous house where I'm allowed to stay. It is absolutely charming and I am so grateful for it. There's nothing like going back after a long day of rehearsals and being able to just relax in a comfortable, beautiful home. I'm sharing it with a Tatiana and an Onegin and we've been having so much fun together.

There is something special about being part of a cast: for a little while, they become like your adopted family. This sense of belonging, and of working to create something together, is one of the most satisfying elements of this art form. And when you hit it just right, it can be magic. :)

The Lesson of NaNoWriMo

2011-06-27T00:10:00.004-04:00

For those of you who don't know, NaNoWriMo (or, National Novel Writing Month) is an annual extravaganza where many brave souls join together to try and achieve the impossible: a 50,000-word novel in 30 days. This lovely adventure takes place every November and I have had the privilege of not only participating, but of actually completing the task.

"But what does this have to do with opera?" I hear you all asking. This is not just a moment for me to brag about my extra-opera achievements (because, believe me, that novel was a piece of crap), but to use this idea to explain another.

NaNoWriMo was an adventure in every sense of the word. It had the thrill of starting something new, the frustration of getting stuck after a while, and the joyous exhaustion of falling across the finish line at the last possible moment. I finished with 50,003 words with 3 minutes to spare. But getting there was the most difficult part, because in order to finish on time, you have to write around 2,000 words (or roughly 4 Word Document pages) a day. That means you have to sit your butt down in that chair every single day no matter what and get those words written. NaNoWriMo taught me a new type of discipline and I haven't forgotten that lesson.

When I was given my first assignment with Delaware Valley Opera, I had to learn a 38-page role in 30 days. Not to mention, this role was in Russian, a language that I cannot speak or even read. I was learning it all by rote (aka, by IPA). That meant I had to sit my butt down on that piano bench every single day no matter what and learn/memorize that music. It was a new sort of discipline, but I already knew that I could do it because I'd done it before. I'd made it over that finish line just in the nick of time and I could do it again. It was a matter of discipline and focus.

And I did do it. I finished memorizing the role just in time, just as I thought I would. Every project brings new challenges and this one has been no different. I'm learning so much from rehearsals and from working with older and more experienced singers. I feel so incredibly lucky to be training in this way. But I'm also lucky for my non-opera experiences, because we can learn from anywhere and every lesson is important.

NaNoWriMo and Eugene Onegin together taught me that it's best to try as many things as you can, because you never know when one thing will help you achieve another. The world is a huge web made of connections that you can sometimes not foresee, but are grateful for in the end. I'm happy to be learning and growing and finishing things one day at a time.

The Announcement

2011-05-05T10:44:00.000-04:00

I feel that I can now officially announce that this year, I will be part of Delaware Valley Opera's Professional Artist Development Program!

I'm so excited! This is such an amazing opportunity and I can't wait to get started!

My first opera with them will be Tchaikovsky's Eugene Onegin. I'm singing the role of Larina (Tatyana's mother), which is exceedingly beautiful and rather challenging. The language itself is extremely difficult (for me), but IPA helps so it's not impossible. Besides, this is a great time to get better at it! And of course Tchaikovsky's music is just the right blend of beauty and complexity. It's not easy but it's so worth it!

Right now I'm just pouring over my score and carrying it everywhere (basically sleeping with it like a stuffed animal), spending every spare moment working on it. I sent in my costume measurements and realized, "This is for real!"

I have to admit that I'm rather nervous: the rehearsals start in a month and this will be my first real "professional" experience. I just really want to be über-ready. Needless to say, I'm pumped! And I'll be sure to fill you all in on things as they progress. Until then, no rest for the weary!

Recital Wrap-up

2011-04-29T11:37:00.007-04:00

I just got my pictures back from my recital. Here are a few highlights. :)

All photos by David Salazar

Darn you, Carol Vaness...You Make It Sound So Easy

2011-04-23T01:01:00.003-04:00

That aria never gets old. And Ms. Vaness sings it so effortlessly. The beauty of her tone always cuts right to my heart.

You could say that this video is a peace-offering of sorts: an apology for being so quiet recently. My life has been a bit of a roller-coaster and it's hard to sort ideas and feelings into words when they are so turbulent. But I'm back now and I can tell you a little bit, if not all, of what's going on.

First of all, my senior recital went well and from what I understand, the audience enjoyed it (which, arguably, is the best sort of reward). I had tons of fun, sang stunningly gorgeous music, and was blessed to collaborate with incredible artists. What more could a girl ask for?

With that wrapped up, I only have opera scenes left (in terms of solo singing) at school before I graduate. I'm excited to sing both Carmen and Hermia, but I'm equally excited to graduate. It's been a good four years. They've been instructive, challenging, frustrating, exhilarating, and fun. I'm so glad I had the opportunity to experience them and now I'm happy to move on and do something new.

I'm just as committed to my dreams and goals. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for me! I can't tell you everything just yet, but I have some exciting news on the horizon. Just hold tight until I can make the proper announcements!

But I can tell you that I will be attending New York Opera Studio's Summer Intensive in June. Let's hear it for opera boot camp! They haven't released the scenes yet, but I'm very excited to find out what I'll be working on this summer. I'm sure it will be a great learning experience and another chance to meet more singers. :)

Until next time -- Tchüss and Happy Easter!

Recital!

2011-04-08T13:55:00.004-04:00

I can hardly believe it, but tonight is my senior recital! It's been a really crazy week leading up, but I'm ready and I'm really excited. It should be a lot of fun and just a nice night of music. What else could you ask for?

Family + Friends ~~+ Mozart~~* + Music + Food + Pretty Dress =

LOVE

*Due to an unforeseen outbreak of strep throat, Herr Mozart will not be in attendance as planned.

Caption Capers

2011-03-15T09:42:00.002-04:00

"I finally got to sing at the Deutsche Oper but all I got for a costume was this stupid towel."

There are some things that make me a bit less envious of older, "more successful" singers.

And there are some things that just make my day. :)

Read/see more about Deutsche Oper's production of Tristan und Isolde at Intermezzo's blog.

An Empty Inbox

2011-03-10T10:49:00.005-05:00

"But the important thing about learning to wait, I feel sure, is to know what you are waiting for." -Anna Neagle

When I imagine things, I always see the beginning and the end, but I never seem to foresee the place between them, the void that begs to be filled. This unfortunately oversight always leaves me scrambling, desperately searching for a solution to this unforeseen problem.

I finished my auditions and it took a day for the fact to sink in that I'm actually done. It seemed like a miracle. Then the brilliance of completion faded and the dullness of waiting swept in to take its place.

I have never been so upset by an empty inbox.

I feel like I'm living in suspended animation -- it takes everything in me to focus on other things (like, for example, my senior recital which is only a month away!), things which are necessarily important. I just can't stop thinking about the results of my auditions. These little emails will determine how my life will continue for the next few years. Right now, that seems like a big deal.

I know I'm probably dramatizing this whole thing. In fact, I know I am. The emails just have to come and then I can deal with it all. Until then, I have to accept the fact that the suspense will continue to torture me.

I guess until then, I can just laugh at opera shenanigans. That Carmen skit never gets old...

original photo

Pants or Skirts?

2011-02-20T12:30:00.004-05:00

If I project my schedule into May, I will have done no pants roles for 10 months. NO pants roles. 10 months. I never thought those two ideas would occur in the same sentence.

Skirt roles can be fun and interesting and challenging and complex. Donna Elvira was nothing short of a challenge (in every sense of the word) and now I'm confronted with another challenging role: Carmen. I'm also happy to play a romantic lead (Hermia) even though I'm a bit miscast since she's supposed to be short (haha).

It's just a bit jarring to go from all those pants roles to absolutely none. I never realized how freeing playing a pants role can be. When I was playing Orlofsky, I showed up to rehearsal every day in jeans and sneakers and lounged around all day. When I played Elvira, I had to wear a pencil skirt, high heels, and a 1950s style corset every day. As Orlofsky, I could basically do whatever I wanted but as Elvira, I had to hold myself to her exacting standards. I mean, those are the difference between those two roles specifically, but I think, in general, as a pants role you can run around and have fun but as a skirts role, you have to be on your toes and walking on eggshells, just as most women do every day.

So it's just another change that's happening right now. I'm sure I'll be playing pants roles again soon enough. I mean, who knows what I'll be doing in a few months? Only time will tell.

In the meantime, I'd love to share one of my favorite new videos, courtesy of the lovely Joyce Didonato. And if you asked me, I'd pick pants any day. ;)

What's With All The Preparing? Just Go!

2011-02-07T11:26:00.005-05:00

It's hallway time -- that place between the closing door and the opening one.

Closing door: Don Giovanni

I got my first review! Sure, it's only in my school newspaper, but my name was mentioned and in the printed article there was a picture of me holding a gun to Don Giovanni's head so I'm more than happy to share it with the world. Naturally, my favorite line from the review is: "The three female leads Pecce, Feltkamp, and Fabian had voices so powerfully moving that they made the show." :)

Don Giovanni: The Man, The Myth, The Sex Addict (not my colorful title, but the author's)

Opening door: Grad school auditions

I'm less than a week away from my first audition! I'm very excited and a bit nervous, but I know that I'm ready. Or, at least, as ready as I'll ever be. I did some last minute shopping yesterday to spruce up my audition attire, so I feel that my preparations are officially complete. I'm grateful that this first audition is so much earlier than the others because it gives me a chance to learn from this first experience and have time to implement some improvements before my next set of auditions at the end of the month.

Things just keep zooming along and I have to do everything I can just to hang on.

Oh! And I'd love to extend my congratulations to the lovely Cecilia Bartoli on her (long-awaited) marriage to the talented Oliver Widmer! I wish them all the happiness in the world.

I'm always so happy to hear about people in the opera world getting married. I'm not sure that it happens often enough, but when it does happen, it always brings a little bit of sunshine into my day.

Questo il fin

2011-02-01T16:45:00.010-05:00

Don Giovanni, my work and my passion for the past 9 months, has come to a close. It's always strange and difficult to say goodbye to something that was such a huge part of your life for such a long time. Of course I'm not overly sad because 1. it was such a rewarding and satisfying experience and 2. it's never "goodbye forever" with opera because there's always the chance that you will play that role again. However, this cast and this production was a one-time thing and I will miss it, but I'm not sad at all because it was such a positive experience and I feel accomplished.

This production involved a ton of "firsts" for me:
-first time playing a woman
-having something more than terza donna
-working with a conductor who is not my professor
-bowing last (woman)
-"receiving" the maestro during the bows
-curtsying (!) during the bows
-singing a role that's often considered a "soprano" role
-performing secco recitative in a full-length opera
And there were many more-- I'm sure of it.

I think the worst part about closing a show is putting aside the character. Elvira was fun and she had so much energy. I learned from her and from the journey that it took to find her. I will miss singing her music and living her life, but I'm happy because I had the opportunity to do so in the first place.

For me, the end of a show, more than anything else, births gratitude. I am constantly in awe of the wonderful and incredible things that I'm able to experience and be a part of. Now I have to go back to "normal life" and get ready for some more important things. It's different, but it's still exciting. There is so much to prepare for and to look forward to.

So I'll leave you with a few visual highlights from the show. As usual, I adored my costume, which is something that I always hate giving back.

Pictures Courtesy of David Salazar (#1 & #3) and Joseph Estrema (#2).

And Straight On 'Til Morning...

2011-01-21T12:13:00.003-05:00

My life is a whirlwind of Mozart and high heels and '50s lingerie. Rehearsals for Don Giovanni are constant and intense. But I couldn't be happier! It's so thrilling to wake up every morning and think, "Today I'm going to have the opportunity to create something. Today I get a chance to be somewhere else, to be someone else, and to experience something completely new." I feel so lucky, so privileged.

We had Sitzproben on Tuesday and Wednesday and a Wandelprobe last night. It felt so wonderful to sing in the theater again. My voice always feels a little cooped-up in the rehearsal space. It was so freeing to let it loose in the big house again. And of course it's always a treat to have an entire orchestra to sing with! Mozart's music just soars and I feel that rush of adrenaline as I simply enjoy the ride.

I can't wait for tech week/"hell week" to start! I'm really attached to this production and I love it to pieces. My fellow artists and the production team are so great to work with and I'm just so grateful for the entire experience. It's only going to get better from here on out!

My favorite part of the early rehearsal period (before you add in all the trimmings) is those moments of discovery. For example, during one of our rehearsals, my director called out a Shakespearean character for me to integrate into the scene. I did and instantly the scene took on a completely new life for me. That's one of the things I love most about art: one art form or work of art can inform and enhance another. Shakespeare's characters are so deep and complex. Therefore, bringing even one element of one of his characters into my interpretation enriched my character and my scene.

And we all learn from one another. I've watched some incredibly talented artists render Shakespeare's works and they have inspired my own work. I have watched the others in my cast and listened to my directors. Art is all about building. True art is always increasing and never diminishing. Each individual adds their uniqueness to the mix and the final product is so much bigger and greater than any one person could have achieved on their own. Differences don't divide the whole, but instead they multiply it. This is the lesson I've learned these past few weeks in rehearsal.

This realization encourages me, inspires me. I can only hope that what we've created will inspire others and bring something new and good into a world that desperately needs the new and the good.

HelloGoodbyeWhatever

2010-12-17T12:05:00.007-05:00

Another semester completely finished! I couldn't be more relieved. As my dad said, "7 down, 1 to go." It's really crazy to think that I only have one semester left of undergrad, but I think the timing is perfect. Some people get pretty weird when it comes time to graduate, but I feel now like I did when I graduated from high school: happy, accomplished, and ready to move on to something new.

Four years is a long time to spend in one place. The adults in my life talk about how it "flew by" but it didn't "fly by" for me. I worked hard, learned a lot of new things, cherished many special moments, and wrestled through some challenging ones. It's not over yet but it's been a good (and interesting!) three-and-a-half years. It seems like just when I get used to everything, something changes. Things are always changing and that's something that I can be sure will continue even after I leave undergrad.

A friend mentioned to me that my blog has been "general" lately: that I haven't been updating as much and, when I do, I don't really talk about myself. It's true -- I've been quieter recently and that's because things are changing and I'm not sure what to say about them yet. There are a plethora of question marks hanging in the air and I can't bring myself to challenge them in any way, shape, or form except in my own thoughts. Events and feelings have been very personal lately and I would never bring myself to blog openly about them.

But to move on! I felt successful about the outcome of my scenes program Tuesday and my (last!) voice jury yesterday. Now I have so much to look forward to! Rehearsals for Don Giovanni start right after the New Year and I couldn't be more excited. I can barely contain myself, even now as I'm just thinking about it! It's going to be everything that a good adventure must be: thrilling, fun, challenging, eye-opening, and full of unexpected twists and turns.

So here's to the New Year with its joys, woes, and challenges! I'm wishing you all a very happy holiday and a wonderful New Year. May you be surrounded by those you love and all the things that make life good. :)

Diversity in Distance

2010-11-29T17:06:00.004-05:00

When you're watching an opera, distance isn't something that you always notice. But I've certainly been noticing it recently and it has affected my entire opera experience. I attended two very different operas these past two weekends. Two weekends ago, I saw Opera Manhattan's black-box production of La Boheme and last weekend I went to the Met for their Cosi fan tutte. (Performances: Nov. 20, 8pm and Nov. 27, 8:30pm respectively.)

Granted, these two productions were about as different as two things can be. Boheme was intimate, raw, and strikingly relevant, but Cosi was flippant, ridiculous, and a million miles removed from me. The singers of Boheme were a handful of feet away from me, lamenting their losses and rejoicing in their triumphs. At the Met, the singers, equally emotive, were hundreds of feet away. But it was more than physical distance. The characters of Boheme were living a life similar to my own and, ironically, parallel to the lives of the singers portraying them. How striking to watch artists, young and (perhaps) struggling emotionally and monetarily, playing characters who are experiencing the same thing. Then, after that emotional roller-coaster, I saw Cosi which was so sickeningly flippant that you could only laugh at it all. The singers were no less committed or talented, but the material and the venue was so very different from that of Boheme. Stunned, I thought, "How can two performances of the same art form be so radically different?"

The inherent difference between Boheme and Cosi is, of course, the distance that the composer purposefully and carefully creates between the characters and the audience. Boheme finds all its power in its ability to relate to the common person. It feeds off commonality: common circumstances, common people, common feelings. Everyone knows what it is to love someone and what it is to lose someone. Puccini draws you in as close as possible and then plays mercilessly with your heartstrings. This is why I found Opera Manhattan's production so effective. The venue was small and simple: a black box with two doors and movable set pieces. The singers were young, emotive, and cast well in their roles. They wore modern-day clothing and used modern-day technology. Rodolfo could have been my next-door neighbor and Mimi could have been the girl who sits next to me in English class. It meant so much more to see these ordinary, modern-day people struggle with poverty, morality, love, friendship, loss, and sacrifice.

Mozart, however, did the exact opposite with his Cosi. He pushes the audience as far away as possible. More than anything, I feel that it's a survival technique. If the events of Cosi were brought close, like the events of Boheme, it would be horrifically tragic. I always think of the opening Act II trio in Don Giovanni: if there isn't an element of humor in that scene, it becomes tragic to the point of destructively depressing. There is something deep and horrible about watching Giovanni seduce Elvira for the second time, this time even more deceptively than the first, using Leporello like a soulless puppet. That is the feeling that Cosi flirts with continually but never reaches because Mozart keeps the audience at a distance. Granted, there are glimpses of seria, but they vanish quickly, as a mist, and you're left wondering if they were ever there at all or if they were only figments of an over-emotional imagination. I especially liked the Met's production because it didn't dwell on those moments of serious emotional. It gave them credit, but then moved on quickly. The entire production caught the over-the-top feel of the opera and the ending was especially spontaneous, leaving the audience happy instead of confused, as some productions are prone to do.

Despite their differences, both operas did something for me. While Boheme touched my emotions and reminded me of the reality of things and of the constant need for compassion, Cosi reminded me that sometimes you have to take things lightly and just have fun, because life has to be about sparkle just as much as it has to be about weight. Balance -- that is the great lesson here, the lesson which I will always strive to complete.

The diversity of opera continually surprises me. Opera can create so many different moods and evoke so many different emotions. Each opera deals with the audience in its own, unique way and that is one reason why it can always remain interesting.

Art as Teacher

2010-10-13T12:29:00.004-04:00

Ok, I knew this opera (Don Giovanni) was going to be emotional, but I'm now realizing that it's going to be much more intense than I ever imagined.

We had our first acting rehearsal yesterday for the Act II sextet, which we are performing in December as part of opera scenes. We're using it as a premiere for the opera in January. I think it's a great idea and I was very happy to be chosen to be part of the scene. But I digress.

The scene is pretty complicated so I don't want to bore you with details, but it suffices to say that I had to look people in the eye and face emotions that I do not like -- in fact, I go out of my way to avoid these emotions and situations in real life. It is so scary to plead with four people and have them all look back with cold, unyielding eyes. It felt like an embodiment of all the apathy and selfishness in the world. And all this while singing some of Mozart's darkest music. Ahh!

I could go on and on about all the little things that happened in that short rehearsal, but it boils down to this: in this role, I'm forced to face all the things that I hate most. And that is scary. This is such an emotionally charged opera and the music is just so expressive and I know now, for sure, that this role is really and truly going to be an adventure. I learn so much from every role that I sing and I feel that Donna Elvira is really going to take me through some tough places. She's going to teach me things that I really need to learn just for life, just for me.

Art has this incredible power to reveal the most vulnerable parts of us -- to turn them transparent and expose them to the cruelest scrutiny. People are always afraid of others seeing their vulnerability, but I think it is far scarier to see your own vulnerabilities and have to face them in the full light of day.

And, yet, art has a healing power to it as well. Once those vulnerabilities are exposed, art brings the balm to soothe the pain. In this way, art is more like a doctor than an enemy because it exposes things in the hopes of fixing them.

This is why I believe so strongly in my craft. I want to be a conduit for inspiration and exposure and healing for everyone who is willing and, in this process, to better understand myself so that I can be a more positive force in the everyday world I live in. Because life is all about making things better and I plan to use the talents and skills that I've been given to do my best to make things better in any way that I can.

Tonight!

2010-10-09T13:12:00.002-04:00

Pretty Gown √
Nails Done √
Jewelry √
Pantyhose √
Family and Friends √
Great Music √ (Memorized! √)

I'm so pumped for my concert tonight! I feel so incredibly privileged to be part of such a great group as Opera Manhattan. I can't wait to sing with my talented and fun colleagues! I just love collaborative work, especially when it involves opera music. :) Granted, I like almost anything when it involves opera music!

I arranged my life so I could take today "off" to get ready. I've found that it takes so much time to really prepare for a performance. And I could barely sleep last night! I kept waking up and making myself go back to sleep. I'm so excited!

When I was walking to dress rehearsal last Tuesday, it suddenly hit me that I'm part of a professional opera group for the first time. I passed some crew guys for the Late Show and a dancer for the new Spiderman broadway show and I thought, "I'm an artist, just like them." Here I am in Manhattan, one of the cultural capitals of the world, walking to dress rehearsal for a concert in Symphony Space. I'm working with professional opera singers and producers and coaches. It just suddenly felt so real to me. And that is a very nice feeling indeed.

I can't help but look at my life and be so incredibly grateful for everything that I've been given. I am so so blessed and I never forget that. God has given me so much. I can only hope that I give it all back tonight with my performance.

Wagner, Booing, and Patrick Stewart

2010-09-28T18:31:00.001-04:00

If this doesn't make your day, I don't know what will.

Awww, Patrick Stewart at the Metropolitan Opera. What could be cuter than that? lol

Last night was the opening night of the Met season and there were celebs galore (Meg Ryan, Holly Hunter, etc). There was also booing galore. The crowd booed the director when he came out for his curtain call.

What is this? There hasn't been booing at the Met for the longest time and now we've had booing on the opening night of the season two years in a row. Last year they booed the new production of Tosca and this year they booed Wagner's Das Rheingold. Crazy! Apparently we are entering a new era in American opera and I'm here to witness it. Are we the next La Scala? lol I highly doubt it.

I'm kind of surprised the celebs made it through Wagner, even though Das Rheingold is the shortest installment of the massive Ring Cycle. It's only two-and-a-half hours (lol) with no intermissions (that's the hard part). The last part of the Ring Cycle is almost six hours long. It's title is so long that it almost takes 6 hours to pronounce it -- Götterdämmerung. I love the German language and its super-long words. :)

But much can be said for the die-hard nature of opera fans. The Met broadcasted a simulcast outside, in Lincoln Center, and people stood out there in the rain to watch it. Unlike the celebrities inside, they stood for the two-and-a-half hour opera. What dedication! I would have been right there with them had I not had opera rehearsal last night. :) Viva l'opera!

College Essays, aka Deja Vu

2010-09-23T09:36:00.004-04:00

After I finished my final essay for undergraduate admission, I assumed (somewhat naively) that I'd never have to write another college essay again. So you might understand why I was taken a bit off guard when I started my grad school applications and found that I had to write more essays.

Why is it that they always ask the hard questions? Something like "What value do you believe your art form has for society?" is something that could take me weeks to answer properly. There is so much to be said! Too bad there's a 1-2 page limit!

All I can say is, I'm glad I started early because this is going to take me a while. How can I possibly smash all my feelings and opinions on these huge, important subjects into 500-word packages? I suppose now is the time to discover the definition of "concise." These essays are going to take some soul-searching and word-wrangling, but, as always, I'm excited for the challenge.

Bring it on, college essays! Do your worst.

Debut!

2010-09-18T00:05:00.002-04:00

I'm pleased to announce that I'll be making my company debut with Opera Manhattan on October 9th in their "Great Opera Ensembles" concert! I'm very excited!

I'll be singing Pauline in a duet from Queen of Spades and Third Lady in the opening trio from The Magic Flute. It's taking place at Symphony Space in Manhattan, so this is also my NYC debut. I'm so privileged to be a part of Opera Manhattan's Studio Ensemble Program and I can't wait to see what I'm going to learn and experience!

There is so much opera in my life right now that I could just burst from it. I LOVE IT! :D

Singing Opera = Lose Weight?

2010-09-09T22:38:00.002-04:00

Here is an amazing, amazing lady talking about a very important topic: singers and their weight. I love what she says here; she's dead-on and she would know! Dame Kiri Te Kanawa is one of the most committed artists I have ever known, you know that she works hard at everything she does, and she always looks great on stage (and off!) so I trust her opinion. You tell them, Dame Te Kanawa!!

Here's the interview on BBC.

Check it out - she has lots of wisdom to share with us all. :)

Klingon Opera - You Can't Make This Stuff Up

2010-09-04T13:53:00.002-04:00

If you happen to be one of three people in the world who likes opera and Star Trek, you'll appreciate this project that a Dutch theater has undertaken.

They're premiering a Klingon Opera! How exciting, right? hahahah YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP.

Here's a link to the theater and here's a link to an article about it written by WIRED (which has some funny promotion videos). Have fun!

School is Creeping Up...

2010-08-27T11:26:00.002-04:00

stolen from cuteoverload

Sharing is Caring

2010-08-06T13:26:00.002-04:00

If you're like me and stuck at work on a Friday with nothing to do but read Slaughterhouse-five, then you'll appreciate perusing one of my favorite websites:

CUTE BOYS AND THEIR CATS!!!

So that's my gift to you today; enjoy. Honestly, I need to get a few pictures of my boy and his cats up there...

Avoiding the Countdown

2010-08-05T11:56:00.003-04:00

According to my internal clock, summer is still in full swing. To celebrate such, I'd like to bring you a cool new music video featuring robots, guitars, and pretty lights. HOW COULD YOU RESIST? ;)

Fighting Off the Question Marks

2010-08-03T14:45:00.004-04:00

"Slow down, you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart, tell me
Why are you still so afraid?"
-"Vienna" Billy Joel

It's amazing how a few tabs of Mucinex can make you feel, suddenly and completely, like yourself. No, it's not how it sounds.

I've been languishing on the couch for days now with 1. a sinus infection and 2. no hopes of practicing. As you may well know, this is an acute form of torture (and the former sentence is an acute form of sarcasm). I'm the kind of person that can't stop thinking about what I need to get done. Needless to say, I can't get anything done when I'm sick. Hence, the torture. I've had plenty of time to think about all the impending events of my life and the question marks have been swarming like flies over a pig carcass. That, and I really enjoy practicing and going a few days without it inevitably causes withdrawal pain.

But, back to the Mucinex.

I was walking out of work when I quickly looked into my bag and saw the innocent set of Mucinex tabs. When I thought about the other things in my bag (a binder of music currently being slaved over, a voice recorder, a bestseller with a snarky narrator that knows about as much useless stuff as I do, chapstick, my cellphone, etc etc), I realized that these are the same things that were in my bag the same time a year ago (albeit I have upgraded from Walgreen's chapstick since then, but that's beside the point).

Granted, this isn't an epiphany in any sense of the word, but it made me realize something even more important. Even though my life has changed drastically in the last year and I have, at times, felt disconnected from The Kim of Last August, I am still, at the core, the same. The peripheral details have shifted, jumbled, and transformed, but the central Self has not changed. It may seem like life changes from "difficult and yet never insurmountable" to "GOOD LORD, GET ME OUT OF HERE" but that's not true. Maybe I'm too young to have any say in this, but I feel that although life might feel like the latter, it is actually always the former, and the Self can be impenetrable. I can always look into my bag and find some Mucinex or a well-worn pencil or some chapstick because I am always Who I Am and that can remain unchanged.

So now as I face the many ???s that swamp my brain, I can be confident that no matter what life decides to do next, I can make it through and still find a few constants in the jumble that is called existence.

But, hey, at least I don't have this problem:

Land Ho!

2010-07-25T14:08:00.006-04:00

This post will be totally opera-free. Well, okay, I lied, because I cannot help myself, but it will be mostly opera-free.

As you may or may not know, my brother is attending the Merchant Marine academy and he's currently at sea. We are able to see where his ship is on any given day. He's on his way to the Mediterranean Sea, Kuwait, India, and Singapore. And I thought I was going to be the world traveler! I never really thought any of us would be, but I guess I thought wrong. :)

So here's a picture of where his ship is today. They left from the U.S. last Sunday and they've almost completely crossed the Atlantic! It must be really cool to be on the water with nothing around you for so long. Look, he's so close to Africa! How cool is that?

I was looking at the picture of all the ships on the sea, and you'll never guess what I found!

Yes, there is a ship named Elvira! :D I just cannot escape no matter how hard I try.

So I'm proud of my little sailor brother. He spends his days in the engine room which is 100 degrees Fahrenheit on a cool day. Hey, at least he's getting paid to spend time in a sauna, right? I hope he's having fun on out on the big ocean. He hasn't been able to contact us since last Sunday, so I can't wait to see what he has to say when he gets his email address...

50 and 15 - Happy Birthday, Susan Graham!

2010-07-23T11:56:00.005-04:00

Watching Ms. Graham play Octavian at the Met last October made me believe that there is such thing as the fountain of youth. She's fifty today but she can still pull off a 17-year-old boy and make me believe it. Now that is talent.

Susan Graham is one of the sweetest people I have ever met and she's one of the most talented and electric performers in the opera world today. All the best wishes to her this year and all those to come!

I don't want to seem like a Youtube junkie or anything (I've been embedding so many videos on this blog lately!), but I have to share one of my favorite performances with you. Here's an oldie but a goodie from Sunshine Suzy's Cherubino days:

I Now Present the Winner of the 1979 Abominable Snowman Competition

2010-07-19T18:34:00.008-04:00

Honestly, where do they come up with this stuff?

I've been having tons-o-fun surfing around Youtube for Don Giovanni fodder and since Kiri Te Kanawa is rumored to be "the best" Elvira of all time (along with Schwarzkopf, of course), I attempted to find a video of her. And find a video, I did.

If they had a competition for the worst costume EVER, this would most definitely win. I mean, is that a cocoon on her head? And is that a wedding dress with enough bows on it to induce nausea?

And yet, she still sings like an angel, so who am I to complain? Her Elvira is much less harsh than others (such as Bartoli's), but it's clean and beautiful and effecting. Her voice is perfect for this role in both construction and tone. She definitely uses her personal voice to its greatest advantage here. I love how so many different voices can sing the same role and draw so many different aspects out of the same character.

Either way, I present Donna Elvira in disguise as the Abominable Snowman. (She is totally going to win back Giovanni in that get-up...) Watch and enjoy.

[hoʊm]

2010-07-16T15:01:00.002-04:00

What a wonderful ten days I had at NYOS! It was such a positive experience all around. I can't say enough good things about it! I learned so much about artistry and performance as well as got my butt in shape. I walked more than 5 miles a day for sure and I had a movement class every morning.

Surprisingly, I also learned about myself as a person. I wasn't expecting an opera boot camp to be a soul-searching experience, but it was. The things I learned in those ten days will most definitely resonate for weeks and months, maybe even years.

And it was so much fun. I got to hang out with people who love opera just as much as I do and who are committed to the craft. It was absolutely thrilling to have detailed conversations about the great singers of the past and Romantic operas and the difference between Baroque and Classical recitative. Nerdy, I know, but exciting nonetheless.

There's so much to look forward to! I'm glad that my summer didn't end with that program. Now I can take what I've learned and move into this dangerous territory known as Don Giovanni. I can't wait to see what I'll discover here in the murky depths of Mozart's drama. It will most definitely be an adventure.

And Away We Go!

2010-06-25T09:02:00.002-04:00

Just a quick post before I leave for New York Opera Studio.

This is going to be opera 24/7. Ahhhh!!

I just hope I don't forget anything...

Who Stole the Cookie From The Cookie Jar?

2010-06-23T12:24:00.007-04:00

Friday I'm leaving for the New York Opera Studio Summer Intensive. I'm so excited! I'm ready for tons of German rep, diction lessons with Nico Castel, and, of course, pants roles! (I'm still getting used to the idea that I'm playing a woman in the opera in January...)

I will be singing Hänsel (Humperdinck's Hänsel und Gretel) and the Third Spirit in the Pamina "suicide scene" (Mozart's Die Zauberflöte). Both characters are little boys. This should be so much fun!

My music in the Hänsel scene was a bit tricky at first but I'm really having fun with it now. The melodies are so gorgeous and downright cute at times. The witch's music is horrifying - I won't have to act at all! She sings repetitive staccato high Bs, trills, huge leaps, and other crazy stuff. I'm looking forward to bringing this scene to life.

Here's a clip from Hänsel und Gretel with the charming Brigitte Fassbänder and Edita Gruberova. It's not the scene that I'm doing, but it exemplifies Humperdinck's musical style and it shows you just how cute Hänsel and Gretel are! :)

Elvira

2010-06-18T11:59:00.003-04:00

In January 2011, I will be singing Donna Elvira in Hofstra Opera Theater's fully-staged production of Don Giovanni. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

I am beyond excited for this opportunity. First of all, this is the largest role that I've ever been given the privilege to sing. Second of all, it's a Mozart opera. Third, it's Don Giovanni and we're talking about Elvira. She is, in my opinion, one of the most interesting female characters in the Mozart repertoire (and that's saying a lot considering her competition). And her music is out-of-this-world amazing. I mean, she gets to enter to the opening of "Ah chi mi dice mai." What more could you ask for?

Her dilemma is so compelling to me. I've already begun to really imagine how it all went down for her and how she must be feeling throughout the opera. I still can't believe that I'm going to have the privilege to interpret her character and bring her to life.

I feel so intensely grateful. Every day I'm reminded of how lucky I am and I just get chills, thinking "How could I be so lucky? How could I be allowed to be a part of this incredible art form of opera? How could I be allowed to be such an active part of this great story of Don Giovanni and his brush with mortality?" The gratitude within me is just overwhelming. There are no other words for the way I feel.

I take this all very seriously. There's a responsibility to do things to the best of my ability. It's like when a writer sits down to create their novel: she (or he) owes it to her readers to give her absolute best on every page. So I'm ready to wrestle through recit and coloratura and Italian to get to the heart of it all.

I cannot wait. This will surely be another great adventure. :)

Maureen Forrester, 79

2010-06-17T11:43:00.003-04:00

Maureen Forrester, a well-known operatic contralto and one of my favorite singers, passed away last night at the age of 79. She has left behind a gold mine of recordings, all of which have taught me invaluable lessons about music, expression, and life.

Her Orfeo was the first recording of hers that I ever heard. I was studying "Che faro senza Euridice" at the time and this is the first recording of the entire opera that I listened to. I was swept away by the deep expression she evoked with her singing. Even the recit stuck out as immensely alive. I sat there with my headphones on and my eyes closed and I could see Orfeo and understand his predicament. I felt the depth of his loss and it moved me.

A bit later, when I was studying Mahler's Rückertlieder, I turned once again to her recordings and once again, I was blown away. She is a subtle and expressive artist and her singing has changed the way I feel about music.

Even though the world has lost a great singer, we have not truly lost her because her recordings remain and they can still affect us. I suppose that's the beauty of music; in a way, it's eternal and time cannot dim its power.

Here is a segment from Ms. Forrester's Orfeo where he enters Elysium, the Greek version of Heaven, and sings about its beauty.

Checkin' Out Chekhov

2010-06-08T12:55:00.003-04:00

I know this isn't opera or music, but it's something that I enjoy, so here is my find for today:

I love Chekhov's plays, but I had never read any of his prose until I picked up his The Story of a Nobody. It's short (under a 100 pages) and sweet and beautiful. His prose is stunningly poignant; its simplicity has an inherent profundity. I absolutely loved it.

I picked it up to fulfill my Mission101 goal #74: read a book by a Russian author. I didn't really want to suffer through War and Peace or anything and I've always wanted to read Chekhov's prose. They had this little book at my library so I took it out. I finished it in two days.

For some reason, his writing reminds me so much of F. Scott Fitzgerald. They really don't have much in common, but I think it's the way they describe their characters. Their characters are so real that you can imagine them sitting in your living room without causing a stir. They belong anywhere and everywhere -- they are simply people and it is rewarding to probe their depths, or lack thereof.

And I think it's also the feeling that these writers leave with you. At the end of the story, you feel fulfilled, as if you've just discovered some great secret, but you also feel a bit lost, as though something was left unresolved. It results in something nearly perfect with its perfection marred by a single unsettled object. It's like a beautiful room, decorated with much grace and intelligence, with a single painting that is slightly crooked or a vase that simply does not match the style of the room. In a normal situation, the object would be inconsequential, easily overlooked, but amidst the great web of the story, it is essential, irreplaceable. It demands intense attention. The ordinary transforms itself into the unique, the commonplace into the singular. The phenomenon is not new to me, but it continues to shock me; just as good writing can again and again wriggle itself into my innermost heart and stun me with its brilliance.

The Infamous Carmen

2010-06-07T13:55:00.004-04:00

Everyone always disagrees about the character of Carmen. I've thought about her a lot (she is infinitely intriguing) and I was reminded about her again today while I watched an interview with Vesselina Kasarova (found here - Thanks Smorg!). Unfortunately, if you don't speak German, you won't be able to follow any of it, but here are some things that I found especially interesting.

First of all, everyone always seems extremely animate when it comes to their interpretation of Carmen. Ms. Kasarova is always animated (she's so much fun to watch) but she seemed especially insistent in this interview about her view of Carmen. The interviewer brought up the idea of critics and VK laughed, saying that this was her opinion and no one had any right to criticize it.

She brought up the fact that Carmen is a sort of Don Giovanni. This is an idea that I've toyed with myself. They are both epic characters - they stand out from other characters because they are so huge, they are so legendary. Some people consider Don Giovanni to be an archetype. I think the same could be said for Carmen.

Another thing that VK talked about was that, for her, less eroticism is better because "less is more." It is true that the amount of eroticism in opera in general has increased over time, but I think this is especially true of Carmen (I think immediately of Anne Sophie von Otter's Carmen in David McVicar's recent Glyndebourne production). I'm intrigued by VK's thoughts and I'd love to see her interpretation in full. Her voice is so much suited to the role in general, and I think her unique artistry would definitely bring something new to the character.

Looking over VK's upcoming schedule, I am once again dismayed to find that she is not venturing into the States this year. I don't blame her, since she is nice and settled in Europe and she has a family to consider, but I cannot wait for the day when I get to see her perform live. I guess I'll just have to make another trip to Europe sometime soon. ;)

Gluck Attracts the Punks

2010-06-04T14:24:00.004-04:00

So I have a little brother - he's seventeen and intoxicated with music. Music and card tricks are about the only two things that can keep his attention for more than five minutes. He plays the guitar, the oboe, and percussion, but I think his favorite instrument is the stereo. He listens to music all day long. Since he is a seventeen year old boy, he's really into metal and screamo and all that, but he also has an ear for orchestral music (he loves Tchaikovsky's 1812 overture and Beethoven's 7th symphony). Even though he enjoys orchestral music, he has never showed any interest in opera. At least, not until now.

I was sitting on my couch, watching Kasarova sing Gluck's Orfeo (Munich Opera), and my brother suddenly sat down with me. Together we watched Orfeo lament the loss of his beloved Euridice, be told by Cupid that he could get his beloved back, and then descend into the underworld to find her. He didn't say a word: he just watched.

Then, just as Orfeo was about to conquer the evil spirits of Hades, my mom called us to dinner and the opera went off. But my brother's fascination with Gluck's masterpiece didn't end there. He started commenting on the singing and the music and the story. He was really impressed by Deborah York (the woman singing Cupid); he said that he'd never heard such perfect high notes. When my sister came in and asked a question, he took the initiative and said, "He [Orfeo] just wants his girl back. This is a really good story."

I told him that they were playing Orfeo at the Met next season and I asked him if he wanted me to take him to see it. He's never been to the Met despite my urgings that he go. He was ecstatic that I'd bring him to see Orfeo and quickly agreed.

Another score for Team Opera. This is just more proof that opera is not as "inaccessible to the youth" as everyone seems to think it is. ;)

Personally...

2010-06-03T13:00:00.006-04:00

It seems that there is a constant debate over how personal a blog should be. Certainly everyone can read it and ultimately you're responsible for everything you write, but where does the line lie? When does a blog become so sterile that it ceases to be an extension of a personality but instead a dry recording of facts? But when is one saying too much?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately and I've been meaning to write about it. Then I read two posts in the same day on this very issue (consequently both written by opera singers, here and here) and I knew I had to address it.

I've come to realize that ultimately, life is always a tight-rope act: it's about learning how to stay on the rope and not lean too far to either side. It's about scouting the territory, finding the boundary lines, and deciding which lines you should cross and which lines you should completely avoid. Some things are obvious, but others are not. There are grey zones and we must learn how to navigate them.

We are all unique -- each of us is singular in this universe, and I think we should share our selves, our intricately crafting being, with others. We all can harbor a light inside us and if we let that light shine in the world, it can work against the darkness that already lurks about us, plaguing us with its presence every day. I write to share my ideas and thoughts and experiences with those who would care to hear them and I write to shine my light in the dark places of the world. We all deal with things and have bad days; why shouldn't I write about the good things in life? I can't tell you how many times I've gone over to Joyce DiDonato's blog and been inspired or uplifted by her positive posts. When I see something that I like, I try to do the same; I always try to follow a good example and this is one of those instances.

I don't claim to be able to do much - to be anything great or peerless. But I do want to do good things, and if I can help one person at one time in his or her life, then all I have done will be worth it because there is no greater thing than to help someone else. This is one of the reasons I sing and this is one of the reasons I write. I will not be stifled, I will not be stopped when I am doing what I know is right.

So this blog will be personal. I will do my best to shine my unique light and perhaps scare away a few rain clouds along the way.

Flying

2010-05-10T00:50:00.001-04:00

If this is what flying feels like, then I never want to see the ground.

Go Now, and Live

2010-05-07T16:34:00.000-04:00

Recital < 102 Hours

2010-05-04T09:40:00.003-04:00

Less than 102 hours to go before my Junior Recital and I am (for lack of a better word) pumped. Every day I get more excited about it. I can't wait for it to be Saturday! Granted, I have so much work to do before then, but still!

I've been looking forward to my recital since I first heard about it freshman year. That seems so long ago. It always amazes me how time works. "Die Zeit, die ist ein sonderbar' Ding..."

The thing that I'm most excited about is the performance itself. I've spent so much time with this music by myself, in the practice room, and I cannot wait to throw it out into the world. I love this music so much and I've found so much joy in singing it; I just want to share that with others so they can find that joy, too.

For me, performance is such a phenomenon. The music can live in the practice room, but it takes on a whole new existence in the concert hall. There's something inherently incredible about the energy that's created between the music, the performers, and the audience. Not only do I love collaborating with an accompanist and other musicians, but I also love the addition of audience participation. It is in those moments that the music comes completely and indescribably alive.

So many performers have tried to explain this experience, but I'm not sure that words are ever going to be articulate enough to be useful. Words or no words, I'm looking forward to it with all my heart. I cannot wait for that music to be born in that little theatre, shared with the people I love most.

Sympathy

2010-04-02T17:04:00.005-04:00

I feel as though we are not born in a moment, in a neat collection of minutes that can be written down for all inquiring posterity, but, instead, we are born over a span of years, our consciousness developing slowly, discovering the world a piece at a time until, one day, the puzzle is complete and we are born to existence. Sure, once the picture comes together, there are details that still need to be filled in and colors that need to be defined, but there comes a moment that defines every moment that comes after it.

How interesting it is to stand and watch the pieces gravitate toward one another, like a drop of water instinctively absorbing another. Nature -- we cannot fight it and, yet, we live within it. How can we keep from growing up, from understanding who we are, who we are meant to be?

It is a scary thing to stand and comprehend yourself, to begin to see your place in this vast sea of souls. I am standing and I am waiting, watching the pieces fall slowly into place as the lines wax sharper every day. The things I want to do, to see, to be! I could almost explode from it.

But I will wait patiently, working side by side with the One who created it all.

L'etoile

2010-03-22T00:06:00.004-04:00

What a charming, charming opera! It simply blew me away. All of my expectations were exceeded. NYCO, you have not disappointed me!

Needless to say, I had a lovely night in NYC on Saturday night. L'etoile was brilliant. I haven't laughed so hard in a while. And all the cuteness onstage! I love love love this opera! And the entire production was just so beautiful; between the music and the singing and the choreography and the costumes and everything, it was just an aesthetic pleasure through and through.

I have to admit, though, that the best part of it all was the fact that the prima donna was a pants role! YAY MEZZOS! <3 Another great role to add to my To-Do list. :)

Hurray for French opera!

Philharmonic

2010-03-17T13:44:00.005-04:00

One of the reasons I love being a cellist is that I get great opportunities like being a member of the McCarthy Philharmonic. Mitchell McCarthy is a senior Composition major at my school and he's put together a 50+ piece symphony orchestra to play his works.

I get such a thrill from playing in an orchestral setting, but there is nothing like playing music that could have been written the night before. It's such an amazing feeling to play the music and think, "This is the first time that this music is coming to life."

And of course it's really great to have the composer conducting and coaching you. I have been given the opportunity to get inside Mitch's head and understand why he composed the things he did. His music is so inspiring and I absolutely adore it. It speaks right to my soul and I can't think of a better way to experience the music fully than to be a part of its realization.

I guess the bottom line is that music is amazing and it moves me and I love to be a part of it in as many ways as possible.

Viva Verdi!

2010-03-11T11:03:00.008-05:00

I thoroughly enjoyed Attila at the Met on Tuesday night (3/9/10). Muti and the orchestra were thrillingly moving in this early Verdi piece. I enjoyed the singing immensely and the costumes were really cool. (Check out some pictures here at Opera Chic's blog.) The staging was extremely static; the best ways to describe this entire production is "old school." I find it ironic that a new production at the Met is the most "old school" thing that I've ever seen. I've never actually experienced the "stand and sing" style live before. (Yes, that's how young I am.) It was really interesting.

My favorite part about the whole opera was the fact that Odabella was always seen toting around Attila's sword. You have to watch out for those Italian women! ;) LOVE IT.

In other news, I've been extremely pleased with the weather as of late. It's warm and pretty about 80% of the time now! I hope it stays like this; it does wonders for my mood.

It was especially nice because I've been in the city these past two days and I didn't need to drag a heavy coat everywhere. I could walk the city in normal clothes and be comfortable. What a concept!

Life is good. I'm tired and working hard non-stop, but I love it. Viva la musica!

Happy Birthday to Handel!

2010-02-23T20:48:00.006-05:00

I have to admit: I forgot it was Handel's birthday. It's weird, though, because I spent the entire weekend absolutely addicted to his Alcina. I listened to the whole thing all the way through once and listened to various parts of it between 3-8 times. (I'm in love with this opera!) I sang the Act III trio from that opera today in my scenes class. Between that trio, the new Met season, and NYCO's Partenope, I spent a good amount of time talking about Handel today with friends and teachers. And I had no idea until now that it is Handel's birthday! How funny.

So to celebrate, let me share the Handel love. Today I made another discovery! I found a recording of Jennifer Rivera singing Handel's "Come nube che fugge dal vento," Nerone's mad aria from Agrippina. I LOVE THIS ARIA. And to Jenny Rivera: not bad for opening night... I still don't know how anyone gets through this aria; it's absolutely INSANE. She does a smashingly amazing job here. This is definitely worth listening to. I thoroughly enjoyed this.

And I just couldn't leave this out; it was just too good. This video is hysterical and slightly amazing. I've been wrestling through 20th century music in history class, so this really struck a chord with me. I present the newest conductor on the block conducting Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. :)

All Good Things...

2010-02-02T09:21:00.008-05:00

Die Fledermaus has officially come to an end, but what a great run! I couldn't have asked for a better production, a better cast, a better production team, a better costume (!). Honestly, I had so much fun and I learned so much. Overall, it was just a wonderful experience.

And so many people came out to support me! The support was completely unexpected and slightly overwhelming. Of course I can't forget to thank everyone who encouraged me throughout this process. I cherish every single kind word that was spoken to me -- and there were a lot! I really don't know how I got so lucky.

I'm definitely going to miss Fledermaus, and Orlofsky in particular, but I made the most of it and I'm proud of how it all turned out. All good things must come to an end, and I'm not unsatisfied with this ending at all. We had a great run and I am so grateful for it all. Besides, I'm sure I'll get to whip out Orlofsky again. That's one of the things I love about opera: you always have another chance to revisit these wonderful characters. He'll always be there, ready to make an appearance. I just have to wait for the opportunity. :)

I'm so happy. Just so happy. :)

Ah, Happy Day of Divine Delight

2010-01-30T16:01:00.006-05:00

Opening night went smashingly well. I couldn't have asked for anything better! Everyone sounded absolutely wonderful and everything went smooth as glass. I'm just so grateful for all the hard work that everyone - cast, crew, orchestra, etc etc - put into this because it totally paid off. What a triumph!

I think my feet are still floating six inches off the ground...

Farfalle is Your Friend

2010-01-29T13:52:00.003-05:00

6 hours to curtain! That means that it's time for pre-performance pasta! w00t!

I am so pumped! I cannot wait for tonight. It's going to be a great show!

So here's to relaxing until then...

One More Day To Go!

2010-01-28T09:46:00.003-05:00

I can't believe it. TOMORROW IS OPENING NIGHT!!

Yesterday was Mozart's 254th Birthday. If I hadn't been so busy, I would have celebrated on here by posting something. I wanted to have a party, but I couldn't because of dress rehearsal. But then I thought: what better way to celebrate his birthday than to sing opera? It couldn't be more perfect.

I'm all ready to go. I LOVE this show and I LOVE my character and I just couldn't be any happier than I already am.

Much love to anyone who's coming and here's to opening night!!

Or(laugh)sky

2010-01-24T00:07:00.007-05:00

My character's name has been butchered ever since I was first cast. First it was Orlovsky, then it was Orlafsky, and then there's the infamous Offlofsky. It's just like my real name: no one can seem to get my last name right. I've seen some pretty awful/interesting/entertaining things over the years.

But today was the first full-tech run-through. I'm still amazed by how so many tiny details somehow work together to make this great show. There are so many people who are responsible for the simplest things, but if one of those fails to happen, the whole show goes down the tubes. It's almost like every successful performance is a little miracle. I'm so grateful for the crew who do all the things that really make the show work. I can put so much work in, but it can all fail if the crew people aren't their amazing selves. So YAY FOR CREW!

I was so WIRED today. It must have been the costume and the lights and the smoke machine and everything. My character was just so PRESENT and I was amped and I expending all my energy during those hours. I was completely exhausted after my run-through. I fell asleep on a pile of furs during Act III and one of the choristers braided my hair. I said that Orlofsky would protest and they said, "Not if Adele did it." Touche.

This has been such a great experience. I'm really excited for the week to come, but I'm also a little sad because I don't want it to end. But I won't think of that now. Here's to Fledermaus!

A Prince is Born

2010-01-18T00:59:00.002-05:00

I don't know about you, but when I was little, I LOVED playing dress-up. Well, today I got to be 5 again and play dress-up. Only this time it was for real.

I had my first costume fitting for Prince Orlofsky. I don't think I've had this much fun since...well, I've been having a lot of fun lately, but this was really a riot. Christina, the costumer, brought in all these crazy things for me to try on. So I strapped on my 32% Lycra bra and pulled on those boy clothes.

We tried so many different things, but we couldn't settle on one outfit, so I have a costume in the making. Christina has to go shopping again. Yay for another dress-up day! We couldn't settle on a wig, either. I really hope I don't have to cut my hair after all...

Week One? CHECK!

2010-01-16T01:24:00.003-05:00

So, I successfully survived week one of staging rehearsals. I only got three new bruises and I didn't trip at all! I didn't get choked by an extension cord, beat up by a boy, or pushed down a flight of stairs! This is truly an accomplishment. Sure, I gave a few boys some bruises (accidently; I don't know my own strength), but that's okay. They probably deserved it anyway. (LOL)

We did so well this week that Isabel gave us the weekend off. We've been commanded to REST and not do anything. Sounds like a plan. I have my costume fitting on Sunday -- that should be really fun.

Here's to tech week! I'd better rest up while I can.

Resonance, Part II

2009-12-26T00:36:00.006-05:00

Smorg, a reader of mine, asked an extremely intriguing question regarding my last post and I feel that the answer deserves its own post. He asked,

"Do you think it is scarier now to sing emotionally loaded duets today when you may also have to also act the romance of it out on the stage while singing than in the pre-Callas days when the singers didn't have to act much and could just put everything in the voice? Or perhaps the other way around (the acting is making it easier?)?"

This question would most likely elicit a plethora of answers depending on who you're talking to, but here's my personal view on it.

I know that, for me, every element of performance works together and as you add more elements, the performance experience gets more intense. For example, simply singing an aria is intense, but when I really allow myself to get into the emotion of it, another dimension is added and it is more intense than just simply singing. But that's obvious. Now, add another person to the mix and it gets even more intense. They don't even necessarily have to be singing -- if someone is there to work off of, the experience is immediately different. And when that other person starts singing, it's a totally new game.

So to answer the question, I find that physicality in addition to singing makes the experience of performance more intense. Also, I think this is due to the fact that when I'm physically involved, my singing is more emotive and "in the moment." I've found that when I'm acting out a scene, there are things that come into my singing that I can't replicate when I'm just standing there singing. It's usually spontaneous and a result of my acting or of my current physical situation or of something that my scene partner has done.

I don't think that acting necessarily makes the singing "easier," but it does effect it. If my singing partner is physically involved, that changes my singing as well. So I personally think it is scarier to sing "emotionally loaded" duets with the physical acting because the experience in general is more intense and when things are more intense, they are obviously more scary. It's not the physicality itself that is scary, but rather the increased intensity of the emotional and musical experience as a result of the added physical acting.

Smorg, I hope that answers your question! I love being stirred to think through these things. What a fun occupation this opera spiel is!

Resonance

2009-12-18T12:26:00.005-05:00

I'm beginning to believe that there is something incredibly intimate about singing opera with someone.

Anyone who has performed in tandem with other people knows how intensely you have to depend on your song/scene partners. It's a strange bond that you make with them because you depend on them, and they depend on you, for the success of the performance. So when I sing opera with someone, this is already there and I feel that it's very intense because the voice is so unpredictable and opera is so difficult that it's easy for things to go wrong.

Then there's a connection on the physical level because you have to be physically close in a scene. Boundaries that exist in normal life are broken rather quickly, especially with my opera director. When I joined the opera last year, I lost all sense of personal space. We joked about it, but it's real.

But you can say that about straight acting or musical theater. There is another element that is specific to operatic singing. When you're singing correctly, it's loud and it's intense. When another singer is singing really close (or sometimes not even that close), my face bones vibrate. My sternum resonates. The music is so intense that it makes my entire body respond.

So imagine doing a scene with someone -- first of all they're pretending to be your lover, they're usually saving you from some horrid fate, you're depending on them for the success of the scene and you know they're depending on you, and they're singing right into your face and your very bones are reacting. And to top it all off, the said scene partner is usually singing something passionate (this is opera after all). Isn't it normal to feel a special connection with them? I mean, how could you sing something like the Dorabella-Guglielmo duet from Mozart's Cosi fan tutte and not be effected? (I am SO afraid of singing that duet -- it is one of the sexiest pieces of music that I've ever heard. But that's another story.)

Life never ceases to surprise me. I'm continually intrigued by its nuances and hidden idiosyncrasies. And music -- the greatest nuance of life -- never stops making my heart pound.

I Want the World...I Want the Whole World!

2009-11-11T11:30:00.003-05:00

Opera Theater of Saint Louis is hosting the world premiere of The Golden Ticket, a new opera based on Dahl's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. One of my favorite mezzos, Jennifer Rivera, is playing Veruca Salt. (Of course the mezzo would play the bratty kid...)

Also, I wanted to share something that I read recently that really meant a lot to me: Joyce Didonato wrote this in her last post when she explained Dr. George Gibson's philosophy. He believes in the three Ds: Dedication, Disclipline, and Determination. I think that is such a great motivator and thing to live by.

Winter uncovers distances...

2009-11-04T22:55:00.000-05:00

Dear Life,

How can you be so complex and lovely and draining all at once? I've been here so long, trying in vain to peer through you, but all I see are nameless things-- those things which inspire and confound and ignite.

Open to me! Show me your secrets! Explain yourself. Unravel the hand-knit knots that plague my mind. Night and day you stare me down and laugh because I cannot stare back long enough to win against you. Give in just this once--let me beat you!

God, you present such beautiful things: the scent of winter's fireplaces on the night air, the feel of a wool scarf on my fragile throat, the sight of a kiss blown across the room from one so beloved, the sound of enchanting music -- music to break my heart from an abundance of love.

I gather it all about me; I try to let it seep in. My soul desires and yet resists. When will anything make sense?

See, you have tired me out! I can only sleep now. Unconsciousness beckons to me. I cannot push it away; I cannot stop my hearing. I seek it out as it searches after me. Sleep--one of my favorite dance partners. Let us waltz!

Until tomorrow. Only until tomorrow. Then we shall begin all over again. Conflict, love, tension, release, revelation...

Love,
me

Everything = Opera

2009-10-23T12:15:00.003-04:00

I love how everything in my life always relates back to opera.

I was doing laundry with my mom last night (or rather, I was watching her do laundry and blabbing on about my life) and she picked up this red V-neck T-shirt and said,

"I've never seen this shirt before. Who's is it? Is this yours?"

"No," I answered. "That must be Ryan's -- it's a boy shirt. I can tell the difference between boy's clothes and girl's clothes." (I am so proud of my amazing skillz at this point.)

My mom laughed and said,

"Yeah, that's because you wear both."

Touché.

Der Rosenkavalier Strikes Again

2009-10-14T21:21:00.003-04:00

First things first: SUSAN GRAHAM BOWED LAST!

Ok, now, let me say that the Met's Rosenkavalier last night was divine. The last notes were absolutely heavenly. Overall, the singing was fantastic (I even liked the Faninal!).

Honestly, Susan Graham stood out from all the amazingness. She spun gorgeous, gorgeous lines of nuanced gloriousness that just took my breath away. She was funny and always a treat to watch onstage. I love her Octavian to pieces.

The production was so TRADITIONAL. I was almost in shock from of its traditional-ness. I liked it most of the time. I wasn't as moved by the drama as I usually am. I think there was a bit of stiffness in the joints but overall, the music more than made up for it.

But, Susan Graham...so incredible. She brought the house down for sure and I'm so glad that they gave her last bow because she totally deserved it.

The fact that the Marschallin usually gets the last bow is a major pet-peeve of mine. I mean, she's not there for all of Act II and half of Act III and the opera is named Der Rosenkavalier. Why does the mezzo always get the short end of the stick? Finally, Octavian bowed last and it couldn't have been a better mezzo to do the job.

I am happy. I am tired and over-worked and happy.

Zitti, zitti, piano, piano!

2009-10-06T09:48:00.002-04:00

The opening of Il Barbiere at the Met last Saturday was a real treat. Even though it is THE MET, every performance is not perfect (my college buddies are still grumbling about the Fri night Aida) but this one came real close. Every singer was dead-on and the orchestra was so clean. It was just lovely.

I really loved hearing Joyce Didonato sing live. There's definitely something "lost in translation" when you hear her recordings. There's this special dimension to her voice that I've never heard before until I heard her live on Saturday. She didn't let anyone down (by any means!) with her performance.

There was one moment when I gasped because Bartolo and Almaviva were fighting over her (as they do throughout the entire opera) and she fell over. All I could think was "OH NO! She's still recuperating from her broken leg!" But she bounced right back up like nothing had happened. If you didn't know that she was recovering, you never would have known. She whipped around that stage like it was nobody's business. Actually, I think her Rosina was more active than in the simulcast from the 07-08 season.

In short, the performance was immensely enjoyable from start to finish. What a great way for me to kick off this season!

Less than a week until Rosenkavalier!!! I CANNOT WAIT!

Maybe a Psych Degree is Good for Something After All

2009-09-30T12:19:00.004-04:00

My Mom finally put her psychology degree to good use: she helped me with my opera homework.

I'm studying a scene from Werther and I couldn't figure out Charlotte's super-objective. She's a very complicated character and I really needed someone to talk with about it. It took about an hour of conversation, but it was worth it! I went in to Isabel with my idea and she was totally satisfied. I told my Mom and she's like, "I wasn't a psych major for nothing!" hahah

I don't have anything against psych majors; I'm just being silly. My Mom actually did a lot with her psych degree. She went into advertising and eventually got a high-level job with A. C. Nielsen (the people responsible for TV ratings). She's very good at figuring people out and she has given me valuable insight on more than one occasion. It's like having my own personal shrink. ;)

I was reading an interview with Vesselina Kasarova (an EXCEPTIONAL opera singer) and she said something very interesting about acting. She almost alludes to the fact that you can mess up your mind and your emotional state if you take on the wrong characters at the wrong time. She says it this way,

"Beside the vocal range, it’s also very important to know the character of the role. For example, there are roles I could sing now because all the notes are there, but the problem is to bring in the character, and that I couldn’t do right now. Maybe later, with more experience, then it would all come together. With the dramatic repertoire, the point is that you are singing with so much emotion that these emotions really can damage your voice. It's not the notes which are written, but there is so much happening in your mind.. For example, if young singers try certain roles too early, it can be a problem, because on stage these emotions, these feelings, don't fit your personal state of being. Maybe a boy who's thirteen years old isn't ready to do certain things. It's the same for the singer. You will have difficulties to control the balance of all these big emotions. So it's better to be a bit older."

(You can find the entire interview here.)

Interesting, no? I've always wondered about this and I find it very interesting to actually see that someone else has an opinion on it.

This is a whole other discussion in itself (so I'll leave it for the moment), but what I'm trying to say is that this character of Charlotte is definitely stretching my limits. She's my age but she's been through much more than I have and so, in one sense, she's older than I am. It's going to be very interesting learning how to balance the emotions and the music in this scene. This is a very dark, charged scene and I'm going to have to figure out how to let the dark elements of the scene leak in without letting too much in (because that would destroy everything). I have my goals laid out for me.

Oh, and keeping my sanity is always a good thing. ;)

Puttering

2009-09-12T23:37:00.003-04:00

It's true; it's all true. The Merchant Marine Academy played (and defeated!) the Coast Guard Academy. I saw half of the game. I really tried to get into it but my brain just couldn't enjoy it. So at half-time, I left and my sister and I watched Vesselina Kasarova on my I-pod, played "guess that artist," and played "cast that opera" (in which an opera is proposed and you make up your dream cast). So I'm a nerd. I can't help it!

Just for the record, we decided that our ideal Cosi would be:
Fiordiligi - Malin Hartelius
Dorabella - Vesselina Kasarova
Despina - Joyce DiDonato
Guglielmo - Gerald Finley
Ferrando - Juan Diego Florez
Don Alfonso - Hakan Hagegard

Fighting the College Stress (or just Life Stress)

2009-09-11T11:21:00.005-04:00

School's back in session and that means BRING ON THE STRESS! So, here are 5 ways that I've found to reduce stress and bring a little HAPPY! into your life.

1. Read Jennifer Rivera's blog, Trying to Remain Opera-tional. She's so funny and down-to-earth and you'll always learn something about the "real world of opera." Or you'll learn something about life -- she can be very deep. Either way, it's a great way to add a little flavor to your day.

2. Listen to Mozart on the way to class. There's nothing like Mozart to lift your spirits no matter WHAT is happening. MP3 downloads on Amazon are easy and cheap! I suggest The Overture to The Marriage of Figaro (only $0.99!) or one of the beautiful duets of all time, "Ah perdona al primo affetto" (from La Clemenza di Tito) which is also only $0.99.

3. Take 10 minutes to just sit and drink a cup of coffee (or other comforting beverage of choice). Taking time to just "chill" gets you prepared to face the rest of the day.

4. Read a Psalm. Even if you're not "into the God thing" or whatever, you have no idea how these words can bring peace into your life. They're so reassuring and calming -- definitely worth turning to when you're really stressed out. You can find a "modern" version of the Bible (no "Thou art" and such) online. Here's two really good spots: Psalm 37 and Song of Songs 4:8-15.

5. Write a letter. Writing a letter to someone is such a nice (and unexpected gesture). Not only will it give you time to relax and just enjoy something for a moment, but it will have a nice effect in the future when that person gets the letter. Draw pictures on it for extra stress relief. :)

Junior

2009-09-02T11:50:00.005-04:00

First day of school! Last night my sister asked me what I was going to wear and I'm like, "As if I've actually thought about this already...I'll figure it out in the morning." I guess by the time you're a junior in college, you get over the "first day of school outfit" hype. That, or I'm just a mezzo loser. Probably the latter.

I've already assisted many a wandering freshman and watched the professors/administrators/other-important-people walk to Convocation in their Harry Potter robes and hoods. They had bagpipes playing at the head of the procession! I didn't remember that from last year's convocation. I wonder who sang the National Anthem. You think I'd be up on this sort of stuff...

My first class was sufficiently bogus. It's a "real life math" class (aka "Kim needs a math class and this one isn't Calculus") and I'm sitting in class wondering if the person who created this class was serious or purposely creating something ridiculous. I guess I'll never know. My professor takes it pretty seriously.

Today I still have German and Form & Analysis, my two hardest classes. I'm a bit nervous (especially for German) but I'm sure everything will go well. I have a much easier day tomorrow.

And just to prove that I can do something besides sing and rant about opera, here's the first poem in a set that I'm writing called Songs of Orfeo. Let me know what you think.

1
Euridice

Sunlit sky calls to you:
“Come to me! You are mine!”
Your soul – a gathering of feathered light—
stretches to the heavens.

Can your soul escape its prison,
this slight form of flesh
(this one called Euridice),
to return home?

If the light-crafted soul escapes,
what will become of you,
my own—my Euridice?

Will you melt into the earth, into darkness,
never again to see the sun?
Never again to wake with me in the light?

New

2009-08-31T11:06:00.010-04:00

I've been thinking that this blog has become (or always was) rather boring and un-me, which is sad. I want to be able to show off my personality and interests here, but it seems like I've always been tied down by the idea that I have to write a "good" post or that I have to have a "proper" blog. I'm not sure if that idea is right or not, but I think I'm going to throw it out the window. Bon voyage!

From now on, I'm going to write as me. Even that sounds pretentious. OH WELL. I'm sorry if this blog becomes horrible or whatever, but I don't care anymore. I'm just going to write about me and what I'm doing and what I'm dealing with.

This is a new semester, a new year, a new opportunity to be a better human being. I cut my hair pretty short -- it's my version of "growing it out." You have to even it out before it can grow out, right? Right.

*sigh* Haircuts...the bane of my existence. If only my hair was as nice and manageable as it was when I was 10. Then life would be perfect. (ha) Still, why is it that when I was ten years old, my hair looked like it walked right out of a Hollywood dressing room every day? I didn't DO anything! Just more proof that life is never fair. (But mercy makes life unfair just as soon as politics ever did.)

So, this semester is opera-exciting because 1. we have Fledermaus in January and 2. we have opera scenes starting in the next week.

Now I must have two declarations of love.

One, to my new favorite blogger Jennifer Rivera. Her blog Trying to Remain Opera-tional makes me laugh and feel better about myself every day. Much love to her and her honestly humorous antics. The fact that she is a mezzo just makes it all the better. She talks about Sesto and my heart melts (Mozart, honestly). Also, I've learned a lot from her posts on stage kissing and traveling and all those other wonderful things that I have to deal with. Reading about her experiences was like re-living my European Adventure. It's so nice to not be "the only one"! There's something cathartic about reading your thoughts in someone else's words.

Second, my love for a new CD that I just got from my beloved amazon.com: a collection of mezzo arias sung by Vesselina Kasarova. Her singing blows my mind. The one thing that I love most about it is her ability to be so expressive without sacrificing musicality or technicality. She's always spot on with her technique and she never disrespects the music or the composer. And yet, there's something new in her interpretations -- a life and expression that I haven't heard elsewhere. Her "voi che" and "che faro" and "nacqui all'affano" are to DIE for. Actually, the whole album pretty much is worth dying for. Best $7.99 of my life!

It amuses me that I can feel so much for words on a computer screen and the effect of air moving past two folds of cartilage. Words and music...how I love you both!

Safe and Sound and Fighting Jet Lag

2009-08-24T16:20:00.004-04:00

I'm home! I've never been so happy to see the United States and my house! It was so fantastic to come home. It was a great two weeks -- I learned SO much and it was a really good experience for me. I'm so glad that it all worked out. The repercussions of this trip will be felt for years to come; I'm sure of that!

I still have to finish uploading and organizing photos. I'm sure I'll be mentioning stories and such for some time still. This trip definitely opened my eyes to so many new things. We'll see how it all turns out. :)

Glücklich

2009-08-21T16:46:00.006-04:00

School is over and done. I passed! It was a really incredible experience studying with Edda Moser. She is a wonderful teacher and a fantastic singer. In my opinion, her Queen of the Night is unparalleled. She was uber-patient with us all and I've really taken a lot from the experience.

Tomorrow we have one last day to explore Salzburg. We'll go to the closing concert at night and then be up early the next morning to get on the flight home. It's been an interesting two weeks in Austria. It was an experience that I needed to have and that will help me immensely in the future. I can't wait to really absorb everything that I've learned here and apply it in my life. So much to do!

I've really been blessed -- I'm so glad that I was able to come here and do this. Mom and I have had quite an adventure --and it's not over yet! Here's to tomorrow!

Zwar langweil' ich...

2009-08-19T16:54:00.006-04:00

Today was wonderful. A Sound of Music bus tour in the morning, a great lesson in the afternoon, and a beautiful trip to the castle at night.

The Sound of Music tour brought us to places where they filmed the movie and where the actual Von Trapps lived. The tour guide was so cute and entertaining. We sang along with the soundtrack on the way there and back. Overall, it was tons of fun.

The Hohenburg castle was so cool. I felt like I was in Lord of the Rings and hanging out at Helmsdeep. There's a great view of Salzburg from up there and we got to see a gorgeous sun set. We came out from the inner section of the castle just as the sun was setting over the city. Mom said, "Well that wasn't a coincidence. Thank you, God!"

We took way too many pictures. They're still uploading as I type this.

We'll be taking a trip to Munich tomorrow (I have a day off) so I probably won't be updating the pictures until Friday or so. And on Sunday, it's back to the States! It's been quite an adventure here in Europe. There are so many stories to be told and so many things to remember. I have one more lesson with Ms. Moser on Friday. I'm interested to see how it all turns out.

Guten Abend!

The City of Music

2009-08-18T14:41:00.005-04:00

A recap of Vienna, the city of music:

First of all, I want to show you some pictures of the locals. (Uncle Bob, this is for you.)

The main streets of Vienna were a lot like a circus. There was always something going on. Below are some (rather interesting) street musicians.

The square group (playing Chinese music):

The triangle group (playing "Non piu andrai" from The Marriage of Figaro with a Spanish flair):

Here's a video of the triangle group:

And, last but not least, the creepy street musician:

Now, onto the sights. My favorites had to be the Stephansdom (the huge cathedral where Mozart was married), the Vienna State Opera House, and the Hofburg Palace.

First, the Stephansdom. Here's a taste:

You can see all my pictures of the Stephansdom here.

The Vienna State Opera House was interesting because on the outside it was bigger than I expected but on the inside it was smaller than I thought it would be. It only sits about 2000 (the Met sits 4000). It seemed small to me because I'm used to the Met. I'm spoiled, what can I say?

You can see all the pictures of the Vienna State here.

And the Hofburg Palace. This place was crazy. It was beyond huge and it was covered in marble. Floors, walls, ceilings -- all marble. It blew my mind.

Inside the Palace, there were three museums. We went to the musical instrument collection, the arms and armor collection, and the ancient Roman ruins collection. Here are some of the highlights:

See all the Hofburg Palace pictures here.

And of course, as always, you can see all the pictures here. For just Vienna, you can start here.

Now, a special section: FOR THE MUSIC GEEKS.

There were many *squee!!* moments during my trip to Vienna. Here are some of the highlights. :)

1. On the streets of Vienna, I started to notice these stars on the ground. I looked and behold - each one was dedicated to a different composer or important music person! You can see them all here.

2. It's Mozart Land II. Here's another beautiful statue of him and more paraphernalia.

The BEST part of it was standing in his apartment at 5 Domgasse. I stood in the rooms he lived in and stood at his windows and saw the things he saw (the street outside his study window was preserved!). I had goosebumps standing there knowing that he and his family had romped around in that living room, that Haydn and Leopold Mozart had stayed in that guest room, and that Mozart had sat in his study composing The Marriage of Figaro, my favorite opera of all time. They didn't kill the apartment by adding modern things to it like they did to the other two Mozart houses (in Salzburg) and the bare shell of the house made it all the more exciting. There was so much room for imagination and speculation. There are no words to describe my feelings.

3. This piano was given to the Schumanns as a wedding present by the maker. The Schumanns used it until Robert's death at which time Clara gave it to their good friend Johannes Brahms. Brahms used the piano until his death and he always treasured it as a precious gift. I TOUCHED that piano! How cool to think that less than 200 years ago, it was used by three great composers. How absolutely fantastic.

What else is there to say? The place was bursting with music and I loved it to death. I want to go back.

Vienna Waits For You

2009-08-16T17:51:00.007-04:00

How do I even start?

There are no words to describe Vienna. It's everything I could have dreamed it to be and more. It really is the musical capital of the world. You can feel the love and respect for music in the air. All the great composers are like rock-stars there. (As it should be!) Everywhere you turn, there's mention of Mozart or Beethoven or Haydn or Mahler. It was just fantastic.

And the buildings. They blew me away. The Stephansdom was even more massive and gorgeous than I thought it would be. The Hofburg Palace was unlike anything I'd ever seen before -- unthinkably huge and covered (floors, walls, and ceilings) in marble. They had Mozart's Domgasse apartment intact and the view from the window was almost exactly what Mozart saw. As you stood in the room, you could almost hear the ruckus of his household.

And the food! The coffee was out of this world. The Sachertorte was divine and the spätzel was definitely worth hunting down.

It was just win-win-win. The pictures and stories can never do the place justice. Vienna made every moment of annoyance on this trip worth it. I only wish I could have stayed there longer. It is definitely a place that I'll look forward to going back to.

I'm still uploading the pictures (there are A LOT of them) and I'm too tired to tell stories right now. That will have to wait.

Tomorrow is school again and dress up time at night -- we're going to try to get into the Salzburg Festival. Should be fun if nothing else. ;)

Here's to Mozart - the greatest Austrian composer ever!

Ah, the Pastries!

2009-08-14T14:26:00.008-04:00

This trip has been nothing short of interesting. The best part of this trip is the cafes. Definitely the best part. We found the cutest little place yesterday. It was so cozy. We had these little sandwiches and cappuccinos. I love the coffee here; it's a totally different taste and consistency from coffee back home. However, the cups are really tiny (about half the size of a Starbucks tall - cute but tiny) and they're only half-filled when they give it to you. And it costs about $3 (American dollars). Below is a picture of me in the cute cafe.

And here's the rest of it.

Speaking of cafes -- I saw Barbara Bonney in the cafe this morning while I was having breakfast. Barbara Bonney! I couldn't believe it! She walked in and ordered something and walked out, but she was 5 feet from me! She's a professor at the Mozarteum (which is across the street from the cafe and where I'm going for school) so it makes sense, but it was SO COOL and so unexpected.

Speaking of opera -- we're going to try to get rush tickets to Cosi fan tutte at the Salzburg Festival on Monday. Miah Persson and Isabel Leonard are singing so the music is sure to be fantastic. As to the staging...we can always hope for the best. Anyway, it's really fun to see all the people walking to the festival. Some people wear the traditional Austrian clothing and some people just get dressed up. This festival is such a huge deal. When we went to get tickets yesterday, the cheapest seats were 297 Euros (aka 450-ish American dollars). If we get rush, they won't be anything near that bad. We'll see what happens...

The churches and gardens here are gorgeous. Mom and I just spend so much time walking around and seeing everything. We find something new every day.

Bis bald!!

No FM and No AC

2009-08-12T15:09:00.007-04:00

Hello! I finally got a stable internet connection and I couldn't be happier. Things are looking up.

I have tons of pictures to show you. I have a story to go with each of them; if I told all the stories, this post would never end and my fingers would fall off. So I'll tell you a few of my favorites.

We visited the Mozart Geburtshaus -- this is the house where Mozart was born. His family lived there until 1780 when it became too small for them. It's actually the third floor of this bright yellow building. It was so cool to stand in the room where he was born! They had two locks of his hair. He had dirty blonde, wiry-ish hair just like me!

One night we had dessert in the Mozart Cafe. I had to try the Salzburg Nockerl, a dessert that has been famous forever. It was really fantastic. It reminded me a lot of Yorkshire Pudding -- it was a cream/whip-filled baked thing with raspberries on the bottom. It was different than anything I've ever had before but it was really good.

As you can tell, this town revolves around Mozart. You'll see the various store windows and cardboard cut-outs and so on. It's really crazy and I love it. His name and face are EVERYWHERE. <3

My master classes are unbelievably amazing. Edda Moser is a fantastic teacher. She's so patient and she knows exactly how to access and attack a problem. She has such a reverence and love for Mozart. I know exactly how she feels and I love it! She teaches in three languages: German, English, and Italian (depending on what the student wants). The best part is that I can follow them all! I was shocked after the first day when I walked out and said to myself, "I understood almost everything!" That is just so cool. I love being in an environment where I'm surrounded by language.

I'm the youngest one in the class and I'm the only mezzo. It's really interesting to hear all the sopranos and watch Ms. Moser work with them. I'm learning a lot about coloratura and singing high notes just from watching.

Uncle Bob, to answer your questions: I get 25 minutes A DAY of one-on-one time with Ms. Moser and I have been recording our lessons (it is so helpful). I really can't believe how lucky I am.

I need to learn all the German in "Chacon a son gout" before tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Well, there's still plenty of stuff to do and see.

Guten Abend!

The Climb

2009-08-12T03:34:00.005-04:00

As you can see, I haven't updated yet. This is the first time I've had an internet connection since we got here. Internet access is very limited so I'll do my best. I already have tons of pictures and even more stories.

It's very different here. Just when you think you know something, it's something totally unexpected. It's been interesting and challenging (I am NOT on vacation over here!). The master classes (school) with Edda Moser are OUT OF THIS WORLD and I'm so privileged to be here. I'm the youngest one in the class and the only mezzo soprano. (This place is overrun with sopranos! I've heard some amazing Blondechens, Gildas, Countesses, and Mimis!)

Salzburg really IS Mozart-town. Everywhere you look, he's there! It's like Disney-land and Mozart is Mickey Mouse. It's so great. The town itself is gorgeous and really cute. I love walking around; that's probably the most relaxing part of the trip.

The cafes are fantastic. I love the things that they have to eat here.

I'll try to update later with more pictures/stories/details. Until then, I leave you with this:

Me in the Mozartplatz, hailing a (rather inaccurate) statue of the master of music.

The Journey Begins

2009-08-08T13:54:00.002-04:00

Here we are, two losers adventurers on our way out to Austria. We still have a ten-hour flight and an early morning layover in Vienna, but by tomorrow we will be standing in Salzburg, no doubt crying our heads off.

I never could have imagined that this day would come so soon -- that I'd be walking on the streets of Austria before my college graduation. I still can't believe that it's all really happening.

I should be updating with news (and pictures!) of our adventures on a daily basis so keep checking back! Comments, questions, requests, etc are very much encouraged and appreciated. Next time I write, I'll be on the other side of the Atlantic!

Until then, I leave you with this quote by the great conductor Sir Georg Solti:

Mozart makes you believe in God - much more than going to church - because it cannot be by chance that such a phenomenon arrives into this world and then passes after thirty-six years, leaving behind such an unbounded number of unparalleled masterpieces.

Relief

2009-08-06T00:51:00.006-04:00

Thanks to God, it did not rain tonight and I had my concert. I had so much fun!

I'm so relieved that it's over because I was so worried that it would be rained out again. I love that I got to sing (and in such a nice place; the sound system rocked!). I now know that there's nothing more disappointing than a canceled concert.

Now I just have to practice my butt off for Austria. Sing for Edda Moser? Piece of cake.

Listen to that perfection! Ahh, so fantastic!

I cannot wait to get to Salzburg!!

The Hills are Alive (with the Sound of Music-- ahhh!)

2009-08-03T11:48:00.004-04:00

This time next week, I'll be overseas sitting in a cafe enjoying Ruhezeit.

But there's so much to do before then!

Traveling is wonderful and amazing but it's a heck of a lot of work. Next time, I'm hiring an agent (aka my mom).

Still, I couldn't be more excited!

My concerts on Friday and Sunday were rained out. :( I have one more left this Wednesday. I'm praying for sunshine!

Susan Graham = <3

2009-07-23T12:23:00.002-04:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to one of my favorite mezzos. Her individuality, infectious personality, and incredible singing have inspired me and many others.

In tribute, I offer "Parto, parto" from La Clemenza di Tito, one of my favorite Susan Graham moments.

Sadly, This is All True

2009-07-22T13:06:00.002-04:00

You know you're a nerd when...

...you and your friends/family play "guess that conductor" instead of charades.

...you look at a shampoo bottle and say, "Hey! There's a comma missing!"

...you look at the daily Google picture and you know what it's commemorating before you scroll over it.

...you fall asleep with textbooks in your bed and you don't notice until halfway through the next day.

...you quote Captain Kirk in real life and your brother laughs because he knows exactly what you're referring to AND he knows the name of the episode is that the quote is from.

...you think of every purchase in terms of how many songs on ITunes that would be.

...you know a random date that your teacher/professor asked for but didn't expect anyone to actually know and you can't remember how/why you know it.

...you play charades and the choices are: movie, book, tv show, play, and opera.

...you know the Dewey Decimal number of a specific subject.

...you talk about famous people by their first names and everyone knows who you're talking about.

...you can answer the questions on Jeopardy that the contestants don't know.

...you know who Petra is and what their greatest hits were.

...you have drawn out conversations about the meaning of Time and whether it actually exists or not.

...you don't notice that you're randomly adding phrases in foreign languages into your everyday speech.

...you have 43 books checked out and think nothing of it.

...you squee over a New York Philharmonic concert (and think that the first-chair cellist is cute).

...you're 10 years old and your role models are Nancy Drew and an android named Data (Star Trek TNG).

...you can read three different alphabets.

...you know the date of every Mozart opera premiere but you can't successfully drive two miles without getting lost (in your home town where you've lived for over 10 years).

...you correct a teacher's/professor's grammatical mistakes when you copy down their notes.

...you're 12 years old and you want to be an astronomical geologist when you grow up.

...you visit three different libraries in the same day and think that it's normal.

...you use opera singers' names in the place of profanities.

When You Live With Me

2009-07-21T10:31:00.002-04:00

My sister was allowed to get a Facebook account. So what's the first thing she writes as her status?

I guess that's what happens when you live with me.

A Beautiful Day in NYC

2009-07-10T11:52:00.004-04:00

My sister Heather and I had a fun little excursion into the City. We went in to see the doctor (I'm fit as a fiddle!) but we made a whole day of it. We didn't do anything of consequence, but that was the best part of all. We just walked and shopped and hung out in Central Park. I staged an impromptu photo-shoot of my lovely teenage sister. You can find the rest of the pictures here.

I love Columbus Circle -- it is so gorgeous! I love the fountains and the statues. One of my all-time favorite statues (the young boy with his arms out as though he's about to take flight) is in that square.

This is Heather's version of The Lion King.

Here's to a great day in NYC. If only there had been an opera playing...

Lolz

2009-07-07T18:23:00.004-04:00

Vittoria Tesi, a famous singer in the 18th century, refused to play pants roles because it was "harmful to her health." What does that even mean?

Maria Cere was considered so ugly that she was never allowed to take female roles. Therefore, she "specialized" in pants roles. What a compliment.

Metastasio's libretto "Achille in Sciro" tells the story of Achilles who's dressed as a woman until the end of the night where he throws off his trappings and reveals his true gender. However, the part of Achilles was played by a woman at the premiere. Strange, much?

New York Phil: Russian Fest!

2009-07-01T10:05:00.004-04:00

Bramwell Tovey led a smashing concert last night with the NY Philharmonic at Avery Fisher Hall. It was an all-Russian program: Tchaikovsky's Polonaise from Eugene Onegin and his Romeo and Juliet Fantasy Overture, Rachmaninoff's Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini for Piano and Orchestra, and three pieces from Khachaturian's Gayane (including the Sabre Dance!).

Tovey led the orchestra with his usual deftness. I love watching his left hand; he was always doing something or other. Oftentimes, I thought he was painting a picture up there. He was a brilliant standup comic. He had the audience laughing between every piece. My favorite line of the night was as he was introducing the Romeo and Juliet. He was quickly telling the story and he said,

"And then Romeo did what many of us dream of doing: he killed one of his wife's relations in a bloody sword duel."

He attempted to tell the ending of the story without using the words "poison" or "dagger" or "suicide" so he said,

"And they [Romeo and Juliet] were both lying there on the slab and...well, it's all rather gory."

He was fantastic.

The orchestra, of course, sounded simply exquisite. It was all music that even an uneducated musician would know at one point or another. The Polonaise was sufficiently bouncy and exciting-- a perfect opener. I was shocked by the perfection of the balance between the sections. And the celli-- they rocked the house on this one.

The Rachmaninoff came next with Vladimir Feltsman on piano. He had such a unique touch on the piano; it was much springier than most renditions of Rachmaninoff. I really enjoyed it. Feltsman was absolutely outstanding. He was just sitting there, having a gay old time like he was hanging laundry instead of playing an infinitely difficult piano piece. He did all 25 minutes of music from memory (of course!) and he didn't miss a thing. The Variation XVIII was absolutely otherworldly. I thought I would float away, it was so beautiful. I could listen to that forever.

The Khachaturian was great. The second movement, the lullaby, was gorgeous. I'd never heard that part of Gayane before. They played the Sabre Dance at the perfect tempo. I thoroughly enjoyed this selection.

The Romeo and Juliet is beyond words. That piece is amazing to begin with (it's definitely in my top ten all-time favorite symphonic works) and to hear it played live was just amazing. I keep using the word "amazing" because I'm not sure there's another word to describe it. The music swept me away and the story of Romeo and Juliet became something more than it had ever been before. I heard things last night that I'd never heard before, even though I've listened to that piece a hundred times. The opening was so pious; I could almost see the church. The sword duel was exciting and the love theme swept through the room with a passion that can only be born from live music. I heard Romeo's heartbeat ebb away. It was all truly fantastic--beyond words.

I love Tchaikovsky.

Jealous Much?

2009-06-26T00:08:00.003-04:00

This is jealousy x2!! Josh Groban AND Kiri Te Kanawa! What is this? How did he get so lucky? I guess I could also say "how did she get so lucky" but Kiri's amazing enough to get a picture with anyone she wants.

This picture made my day. :)

Stuck!

2009-06-14T22:40:00.004-04:00

I am such a restless person. I always forget this fact until I'm challenged with it.

I have been stuck on the couch since my surgery on Thursday and it looks like I'm going to be here for at least a few more days. I'm not exaggerating here: I'm even sleeping on the couch because I have to sleep sitting up. Torture!

However, there is a lot of light at the end of the tunnel. This surgery couldn't have come at a better time. I have time to waste. To rest. My Austrian Adventure is yet to come and my concert series is also far enough away for safety. I have time to sit and think and be with myself. All day long. I best make good use of it.

At the suggestion of my good friend, I've purchased one month's worth of MetPlayer. What a great suggestion! Now I am not limited to my own library of opera DVDs. Today I watched Orfeo ed Euridice and Fidelio. Both are definitely in my top-five favorite operas. I'd seen the Orfeo live in January and I'd never seen a production of Fidelio that I really liked until today.

I enjoyed Mark Morris' Orfeo: the overall concept was good and well-delivered. I love watching Mark Morris' dance troupe and the chorus was fantastic. The music, of course, was sublime.

I watched the 2000 Jürgen Flimm production of Fidelio with Karita Mattila as Leonore. I thoroughly enjoyed this production. The singers were fantastic, the staging was good, and the music... Fidelio is definitely one of my favorites. It is so Beethoven. I really liked Mattila's portrayal of Leonore. It was convincing and moving. She did a fantastic job with this role. I also enjoyed Jennifer Welch-Babidge's Marzelline. I didn't care much about that character until I saw this production. I felt a whole new life in this character throughout and especially at the end. Almost everyone wins in the end; Marzelline is the only one whose fate is unjust. But I guess that's what a good ending is: bittersweet.

There's another light at the end of the tunnel. When I recover, I'll breathe a million times better than I used to. In fact, because of the extent of my surgery, I'll be breathing better than the average person. How's that? Sounds pretty sweet to me.

Further up and further in! There's so much to look forward to!

It's Real...

2009-06-09T12:18:00.002-04:00

The paperwork came in the mail yesterday. I'm all registered for my master class with Ann Murray at the Salzburg Mozarteum. My Austrian adventure is underway.

I think I could die right now. Here I am, a baby mezzo with so much to prove, stepping out into the wide world-- braving the Atlantic and setting my feet on my homeland for the first time. It feels like a pilgrimage: visiting the birthplace and deathplace of my beloved Composer-Muse. I think I'm going to fall to pieces the second I get there.

Who would have thought this would happen? How could I have guessed that before my 21st birthday I'd be stepping into Austria? This is not how I planned things! Life has a way of going in a different direction than we planned.

But this is so much more exciting than the things I planned! Here I am, a girl who loves her home more than anywhere else in the world and I'm going into a lifestyle that is, by its very nature, transient. But it is so much fuller and rewarding! I can't believe that I've gotten this lucky. I can't believe it!

I leave August 8th. There's much to be done before that...

Good evening, Father Strauss! Good morning to you, Strauss Junior!

2009-05-26T12:16:00.002-04:00

I love reading composers' biographies! They are always so interesting. I'm reading Hans Fantel's The Waltz Kings and it is so intriguing/entertaining.

Johann Strauss I was an interesting guy. Very interesting. He had an equally interesting life. He was:

1. Locked up as a child by his master bookbinder. The bookbinder's wife felt bad and let him out. He ran away with his violin and fended for himself until a musician found him and took him under his wing.

2. Abducted (with his thirty-piece orchestra) by the Czar of Russia. The Czar made him give a concert. He did apologize afterward.

3. Father of ten children, the first of which was Johann Strauss II. He forbade Johann II to learn music. Johann II was to be Johann I's greatest rival.

4. Very sick on a long coach-ride back to Vienna. He miraculous survived the long trip, but just as they were in sight of Vienna, the horses spooked and the carriage smashed against a tree. Strauss emerged uninjured. Once in Vienna, he recovered (much to the chagrin of the newspaper writers; how anticlimactic!).

And so many more crazy things happened. I have just started reading about Johann Strauss, Jr, the composer of (among many other famous things) Die Fledermaus. He was an intense guy, much like his father. It's so interesting to watch families and what gets passed down from parent to child. Both Johann Strausses were extremely ambitious, determined, and musical. I'm looking forward to learning about the younger of the two.

Chacun à son goût

2009-05-20T14:44:00.002-04:00

I have officially been cast as Prince Orlofsky! YAY!

Excuse me while I go brush up on my Russian...

Chopin & George Sand in Majorca

2009-05-19T12:21:00.001-04:00

One of the great ironies of the world is Chopin’s trip with George Sand to Majorca. I’m surprised he would go at all. But that is beside the point.

The funniest thing of all is this: while they (Chopin, George Sand, and her two children) were in Cartuja, they stayed in a monastery. The place had been inhabited by monks just a few years before but the government had driven them out and repossessed the land for their own use. Now foreigners took up residence in the monk’s cells. What a strange place for Chopin and George Sand to stay!

I’ll be honest: I really don’t understand their relationship (yet). It is so utterly complex and the facts are muddled and cloudy; I can’t seem to get a clear fix on what actually went on. This relationship has obviously intrigued others; there are a great many books written on the subject and during the course of every thing written on Chopin, George Sand is brought up. And vice versa. They are both “famous” in their own respects. I suppose it is a curiosity that two celebrities (of two different worlds) would have had an affair, but the interest in this relationship seems to extend past that. I can’t put my finger on it. Not yet. This is one of my summer projects: figure out the Chopin/George Sand relationship.

Meanwhile, I’m excited to listen to the music that Chopin wrote while residing here. Majorca is so exotic— so singular a place. I cannot wait to hear what sort of music it inspired. More to come.

DONE!

2009-05-13T22:53:00.001-04:00

My semester is finally OVER.

I just printed out my honors project. It's getting bound tomorrow, I'm handing it in, and then I'm officially officially DONE.

I made it. Shocking.

Don't Dream It's Over

2009-05-10T22:38:00.004-04:00

I just finished my semester-long Mozart project. YESSS!! What fun it was! And I learned so much... It's pretty much the best thing I did for school ever. And I think that's because I forgot it was for school. :)

I was so happy and relieved and sad (!) when I finished that I just sat there staring at the last line and there were tears in my eyes. Tears! I don't know where they came from. I swear, I have no idea. I didn't know how much this project meant/means to me. I guess that's what happens when you work on something for so long and then it's over. (Well, okay, there's still a lot of revising to be done, but the writing of it is done.) I spent so much time and thought-space and daydreaming on this. I can't help but feel attached to it.

And it's Mozart after all. I feel attached to anything connected to him. I don't know why; I just do.

Three days, three finals, and two juries to get through. I can make it! I will survive!

I don't want to rush it. Once this week is over, half of my friends are going home and I won't see them for another 4 months. :( Thankfully not all of my friends live far away. Still, I'm going to miss the heck out of some of them. Roadtrip!

So next year's opera is officially Die Fledermaus (in English). Auditions are the first week in the fall semester. I'm excited! This is going to be a fun show.

Angelina

2009-05-01T14:27:00.004-04:00

In a few hours, I will be seated in the (somewhat humble) seats of the Family Circle and listening to the gorgeous voice of Ms. Elina Garanca. I am super-psyched about La Cenerentola! I've been looking forward to it for months (aka ever since I bought the tickets last September). I saw her Rosina last season and it was stunning. Lawrence Brownlee should be fantastic as well. I've never heard him live, but I've only heard good things about him.

So I'm geeking out over Elina. There's nothing else to say about it; there are only noises. I'll give a full report when I return (although you might have to wait for it--I'm SWAMPED with work right now. I might not be able to watch my free opera on MetPlayer this weekend! It's that bad...).

19 Pages = Epic Fail?

2009-04-17T14:30:00.003-04:00

Soo...As you may or may not know, I spent my entire "spring break" writing a paper on The Marriage of Figaro. It was the least painful paper I've ever had to write in my life. Heck, it was downright fun. But we'll pretend you didn't hear that.

Work, work, work...7 days and many hours of work later, I put all the pieces of my paper together. I space it correctly, etc etc and...it's 19 pages long. It was supposed to be 5-10. WHOOPS.

Enter dilemma: should I cut it down? Did I include anything unnecessary?

Granted: I kept my outline short on purpose and severely limited what I put into the paper. I included everything she asked for and did not go overboard. What did I do wrong? Mozart, why are you so darn amazing that two measures of your music comes to two pages of writing? WHY?

So I handed it in without cutting a word. Was it the right decision? Who knows. I guess I'll find out when I get it back (aka probably next semester...haha).

And it was some good writing. I actually had original ideas (OMGOSH). It wasn't just quoting from 50 different books. It shouldn't be a boring read. *shrug*

The point of my story: writing this paper and (simultaneously) working on my Mozart honors project has made me want to start ranting on opera. I want to create thesises on different aspects of these works. For example, I'd love to go on about the relationship between the Countess and Susanna in Figaro or how seriously we should take the plot of Cosi fan tutte. I have so many opinions (what else is new?) on the music and what it means and I wonder who the heck would actually read that. Mozart is just SO deep. There is so much to talk about. Everytime I hear Figaro, or think about it, I find something new. That's crazy!

Was denkst du?

Brava Bartoli!

2009-03-05T14:51:00.010-05:00

I know this is a bit delayed, but I've been super-busy with a huge music history test and then I was away for a day in the country (which was absolutely wonderful). So without further ado, here's my humble review of an extraordinary evening of music.

Cecilia Bartoli at Carnegie Hall - 200 Years Maria Malibran
March 3, 2009 - 8pm

First of all, I'd like to say that the night was filled with beautiful and stunning music. Ms. Bartoli is an excellent performer and the orchestra matched her high level of musicianship. She brought her Orchestra la Scintilla from the Zurich Opernhaus. They were absolutely outstanding. I didn't mind listening to the orchestral selections. Every player put their heart into the music; they were truly a chamber ensemble (there wasn't a conductor!). The soloists played so passionately. It was really a delight.

I won't give a blow-by-blow review, so I'm going to skip to Ms. Bartoli's second selection. Her "Caro giorni" (from Giuseppe Persiani's Ines de Castro) almost brought me to tears with its sweetness. She sang it so tenderly. Her legato lines were pure silk and the orchestra wasn't simply accompaniment: it was a true colloboration (all through the concert) and they made some of the most gorgeous music, especially in this piece. I especially loved the interplay between Ms. Bartoli and Ana Pesch, the concert mistress, in Mendelssohn's "Infelice." I've never heard that piece before and it was really something.

The next highlight for me was the Rossini set. The "Tempest" from Il Barbiere sprang to life in the hall; it was so much fun to experience! Her "Non piu mesta" blew me away. Her coloratura was, as always, exceptional. Actually, it was out of this world amazing. After she finished, I just sat there in my seat going "Oh my gosh...She did not just do that..." It was definitely one of the best renditions that I've ever heard.

I really enjoyed the movement from Donizetti's Clarinet Concertino. Robert Pickup, the soloist, played wonderfully. I just love period instruments! It makes so much sense to me that Ms. Bartoli would perform with a group that uses period instruments. I love the musicologist/historian side of her-- it's really admirable. This is just another extension of that love she has for historical-musical things.

She ended the concert with one of Maria Malibran's own compositions, "Rataplan." She certainly had a lot of fun with it. Gosh, that thing is difficult!

She performed three encores. I was so excited when she sang "Non piu mesta" again. Her last song, "Non ti scordar di me," was truly moving. It was love embodied in music. Everyone remarked upon the beauty of her interpretation.

After the concert, I waited in the long line to meet her. It was totally worth the wait. She was so sweet and upbeat, even to the very end. She gives off such a bright light; she's truly a pleasure to talk to. I bought a copy of her new La Sonnambula (with Juan Diego Florez) and she happily signed it for me. I told her that I love her Sesto (Mozart's La Clemenza di Tito) and she said, "Oh, I was very young when I recorded that." I assured her that it was very good and she said, "That's a nice thing to hear." Then my dad (who insisted on going with me; he loved "my girl Cecilia") shook her hand and thanked her for the music. She told me "Good luck" (these people always seem to know that I'm a singer; granted, I was the youngest one there) and we were off. Dad and I were both pumped. We'd met one of our favorite singers. He was so good about the whole thing; he stood in line with me and put up with my nonsense prattling about opera and music-geekiness for the entire night. His favorite was the "Caro giorni" and the closing "Non ti scordar di me." We had such a great night. I'm so glad that I had the opportunity to go!

Her dresses were gorgeous. She handled all that fabric with such poise. Her jewelry (which I hear is actually Maria Malibran's on loan) was pretty and suitable. Her necklace in the first part was very sparkly, but this is Carnegie and she is Cecilia Bartoli.

The one thing I must mention: I've always read that Ms. Bartoli stays tucked away in Zurich because her voice isn't "big enough" for the American houses. I was extremely interested to see if this was true. After hearing her in Carnegie, I must admit that I agree. Her voice filled the hall, but it didn't overwhelm it (and Carnegie is around half the size of the Met). I would love to see her on her home turf, but that will have to wait. She was simply oustanding nevertheless and she makes one heck of a recording no matter what she's singing. It was such an amazing experience to hear her live and to meet (!) her. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Snow Day! + Random News

2009-03-02T00:58:00.011-05:00

No school tomorrow! I'm so excited. This never happens! You all know what that means! Kim staying up late and blogging. Hurray for you all.

I'm very sad that I missed the broadcast of Damnation of Faust today. People called and texted me to tell me that it was on, but I HAD to study for my huge music history test. :( Hopefully they'll show it again and/or release it on DVD. I would have loved to see all the innovative stuff they did and I would have loved to see Susan Graham. Il Trovatore broadcast yesterday. I even heard some of Sondra Radvanovsky's interview (which was really interesting). Her speaking voice reminds me so much of Joyce DiDonato's. I think it's the accent.

I'm going to see Cecilia Bartoli at Carnegie on Tuesday. I CANNOT WAIT!! This is going to be my first time seeing her live. I am beyond excited! This has really been an eventful year for me: I saw Renee Fleming for the first time (live), I was in my first opera, I met Renee Fleming, I met up with my opera-geek buddies, I had season tickets to the Met...the list goes on. Seeing Bartoli is just going to be another amazing night in a really fantastic year. I'll let you know all about it afterward.

Just For Fun

2009-02-25T20:49:00.004-05:00

I've found a Youtube video of a piece that I'm doing in Chorale this semester. It's a vocal arrangement of Rossini's overture to The Barber of Seville. It's hysterical! It's definitely worth taking the 3 minutes to watch. I can tell you that it's as much fun to sing as it is to listen to.

I'd also like to welcome my new readers! Hey Smorg and Tyler! It's great to have you aboard. I hope you don't get too bored. ;) It's really encouraging to have new people interested in my blog. Hopefully we can get some opera-talk going. I hope to hear from you all!

With much love and -of course- much music,
~Kim

You Know You're a Loser When...

2009-02-23T16:51:00.005-05:00

I was at work, typing address labels, and I burst out giggling because someone lived on Hyacinth Lane. Why would that make me laugh? Because immediately I thought of Sophie listing all of Octavian's names in Der Rosenkavalier (that scene is so cute!). Octavian's names are: Octavian Maria Ehrenreich Bonaventura Fernand Hyacinth. I really can't believe my own brain; it never stops!

Speranza

2009-02-19T15:07:00.002-05:00

One of the cruelest forms of torture is having no voice. I haven't had a voice since Sunday. I hate this! It doesn't happen too often to me, but when it does, it's an event.

Anyway! I went to the library last night to bring back my videos of Arabella & L'Orfeo and to pick up the copy of Cosi that had come in from another library. The man behind the desk (middle-aged, dark hair, glasses, always sweet) checked in my videos and asked, rather surprised,

"Are these operas?"

"Yes," I answered.

"You like these?" I nodded and added, a bit sheepishly,

"I hope to sing it one day."

"Really! How did you get into it?"

For once I escaped the wrath of the discouragers! He was genuinely interested. So I told him the story about how I stumbled upon my love for opera. (In short: Figaro.)

He puttered around while I talked, putting away my videos and finding Cosi for me. When I was done explaining, he handed me my 80s La Scala Cosi fan tutte and said,

"How great would that be? You're from Hicksville and you become a big diva. That would be so great..."

How cute is that? He actually took me seriously! Finally! Everyone always gives me the "you're a crazy woman" look. He actually believed me and encouraged me! There is hope!